Friday, July 2, 2010

Like strands of silver hair



I was an awkward kid, hiding behind these oversized Harry Potter glasses, when it was cool to wear tiny rimless frames. When I hit puberty, I finally convinced my parents to let me wear contact lenses on a regular basis.

Every school has labels. I don’t particularly remember being the cool kid, until I bid farewell to that hideous obstructive piece of eyewear that sat on the top of my nose. The day I embraced contacts, I saw this sudden transformation in my personality. I felt as if I was finally comfortable with who I was. Or so I thought.

My glasses then started playing hide and seek with the outside world. On the rare occasions, that I wore my glasses outside of the four walls of my house, I was restless and uncomfortable. It was like going back to being the little girl I so despised.

And then a little while ago another transformation came about. I found my soul-glasses just when I had given up. A gorgeous pair of black and blue wayfarers. I felt unusually drawn towards them to the extent that my contacts started to take a back seat in my life. Nowadays, when I am forced to embrace them again, I find myself ill at ease. I suppose I grew out of glasses just to grow fond of them again.

And why is any of this relevant? Because, I see this as an ultimate acceptance of who I am. Like an old woman who sports her silver strands as sign of the wisdom she has collected over the ages, I am going to sport these insanely quirky glasses, like they are an integral part of me.

Victory


While some people have their fairy tale endings, others wait endlessly for their perfect someone to come along. And then there are those of us who hold onto the wrong person because we convince ourselves that they are the epitome of perfection.


It’s been a year since I let you step in. It’s been a year since I let you step out. It’s amazing how I found the strength to do the one thing I never thought I would.

But my greatest strength lies in the fact that when I picture perfection, I don’t see you in the frame anymore. Nor do I hold onto the illusion that someday who will step back into my life to help me find that perfection I yearn for.

May be I have finally grown up. I suppose you have too. I always thought our paths would intersect someday. But time has made us grow further apart. May be we were never meant to be on the same road.

Monday, June 14, 2010

And for the sake of my fans, I am back! I am back.

My cinnamon laced almond muffins,

Missed me much?
Well, if you refuse to say yes, I refuse to entertain you henceforth.
If you must know, k-ay has been rather busy.
Just when the summer was about to end, the two of us fell in love.

I made so many bags, that bachas have started calling me bag-wali aunty.
Ok not really.
But they will ok?
Someday!

Then I put these very awesome salwar pants up on the blog.
I'm telling you justice exists in this world.
Some very sexy people placed an order also.
May their lives be full of happiness and awesome, awesome friends like me.

So basically Purple Peeptoes has been taking over my life.
That is why I see you less and less.

Other than that, college started.
Now I feel all awesome and Journo.
I put my nose up in the air and look down at everybody.
They're all juniors.
Chota bachas!
TYs like us can act cool and own the place.
Well, you only get a year to act like that so might as well take full advantage no?

Plus, it's so much cooler to look down at people when you're wearing oversized glasses, no?
The geeks are back nigga.
And this time, they're going to take over the world!

Also, this journo thing makes me want to tell all my saxy saxy clothes to go on a mini vacation, while I don some very awesome kurtas and jholas.
That way I can parade around with my bags and do free publicity also.
Such a business woman I am!
At this rate don't be surprised if you see me running around the local train compartment screaming 'deee-jay-ner jhola. Paaanch so rupaiya'.
What a saxy bagwali I will make no?

On that note I shall leave.
But before that, kindly visit I'm too Sexy for my Shirt !

Shameless blog publicist I bees.
In my defense, it consists of my khoon paseena.

Until Rajat Kapoor make my heart beat <3
xoxo

Friday, May 28, 2010

My Nomadic Love


Ever heard a piece of music that took you to another place. Another time.
Ever looked into the eyes of a stranger who seemed more familiar than all the people you have ever known?
Ever had a eerie dream that seemed more real than most dreams have?
Ever wondered why we don't leave our past where it belongs?
Doesn't it fascinate you how it finds it's way into our lives through the conscious, the subconcious and every other medium it can find?

Ever asked yourself who you really are?
Where do you really belong?

I have.
I don't belong here.
I don't belong anywhere.
And yet I belong in every place the sun rises and the stars shine.

I want to grab a bag, pack it with the things I love the most and fly off to another land, with a stranger who harbours the same dreams as I do.
I want to be gypsy.
A nomadic gypsy.
For it is who I have been in another life.
Who I wish to be in this life.

I'll dance and sing along the way, and weave beautiful lines about my journey.
I'll meditate by the shore during the day, and talk to the angels and fairies at night.
May be I'll cast my own Wiccan circle.
I'll look at my coffee cup in the morning and have all the answers I seek.

I'll surround myself with myriad colours until a strange sort of peace descends upon me.
I'll learn about herbs, about plants and the fine art of healing the soul.
I'll train under a master, until I know all the secrets of the Universe.
May be I'll belly dance until my soles hurt and my heart starts to dance to a brand new rhythm.

Grab my hand.
I'll grab yours too.
I don't know if you're my soulmate.
Or just another stranger to me.
But this journey is way too beautiful for me to live it alone.
While I can't say that I belong to you, I promise to journey with you.
Till the very end.

Thursday, May 27, 2010

The Summer and I, we have made our peace.

I kicked.
I punched.
I grumbled, wailed, threw a fit and then poked the Summer where it hurts the most.

However, now that we have made our peace, I'm collecting all the destructive forces, brewing inside of me, for the day I go meet my boss.
Work until graduation apparently.
Which means she wants me to work another year.
FOR FREE.
And I will do what any other self-respecting woman in my place would.
Refuse to work in a place where I am not valued enough to be bloody paid for conveyance.
Let's see if you find a cooler intern, niggah!
Because from what I can see, you're going down!

There is also a lot of constructive energy bubbling inside.
What's better than to dedicate this energy to learning all the creepy stuff that I love so much.
I'm learning a new pack of Tarot cards.
The Osho Zen pack and it is making me very, very happy.

Generally, I give readings over the phone, but yesterday a friend of mine, stuck in the middle of some serious relationship crisis came over for a reading.
I cannot tell you how I got totally carried away, went into this fortune teller mode, lectured her unto eternity about the state of her life and where she ought to take it from there.
It was very satisfying, you know.
Blabbering away as if I really had all the gyaan in the world.

And then I took some very important decisions.
Whilst, digging my closet for an old shrug, I fumbled upon this very pretty black and golden scarf I was gifted a long time ago.
It's got ancient egyptian symbols on it and a very pretty looking sun right in the centre.
If all else fails, I'm going to put that scarf around me, find myself a pair creepy looking cat-eye glasses and a hundred bangles and beads in every colour, until I look like one of those gypsy fortune tellers from a Hollywood movie.
Then I will buy an old wooden stool, find a lonely corner on the beautiful streets of Bombay, set up a stall called K-ay's Corner and become the pioneer of tarot readings on the street.
Only for those who are willing to pay me but.

So money problems will be solved.
Creepy urges will be satisfied.
The Summer and I, will be best friends again!
Happy ending :D



P.S. I'd be more than happy to give readings to all my faithful blog readers :D
If you're too broke to pay me by cash or cheque, you can sed me bars of Bournville in every flavour!
Peace!

Friday, May 21, 2010

Finding The Mystical Mermaid


'It's called Maya', she whispered.
I had known it all along.
I just chose not to believe it.

Ever held onto to something unreal, only because it made you happy?
I did.
But in that moment I let it rain.
I wanted to banish the misty clouds that blurred my vision, only to be able to think.
Think clearly once again.

There were no tears.
There wasn't a smile either.
I felt like the stoaic I never was.

I packed everything and I left.
What I seeked the most I could not find here.
I ran until I reached my haven in the middle of the ocean.
The waves raged on.
The bridge was flooded.
But the noise inside my head was louder than the noise around.
And I knew I had to make it there for my mind to find it's peace again.

I sat there.
Legs crossed, hand by my side, breathing deeply.
The noise started to fade until there was comlete silence.
I was finally at peace with myself.
The Zen mode she talked about had been achieved.

When I spoke to her for the first time, I was 16 and still trying to find my Faith.
But today as I meditated in peace, every word she told me finally made perfect sense.
'Spirituality can exist without Religion,
But Religion cannot exist without Spirituality.'