Sunday, August 22, 2010

Jassi Jaisi koi nahin



It's a bright yellow Sunday morning, I'm so giggly, you'll think I'm in one of those Juhi Chawla- Ravina Tandon type movies and a very hairy Sunny Deol/ Anil Kapoor has climbed up my window with love note in one hand and shady red roses in the other. 

But the truth is, Anil Kapoor or no Anil Kapoor, life must go on. Other replacements have been found. And I spend my days showering my affection upon them.

Apparently, sugar can do to me, what alcohol cannot. While most people are ready to take their clothes off after a few shots, I look at them wide eyed, feeling more sane and sober than I ever did, wondering what the hell my body is made of. On the other hand, when I'm high on sugar, the above mentioned giggly-ness happens. Jokes that are otherwise too sidey to be cracked in public are suddenly out in the open. The random urge to break into song and dance takes over. The urge to sing must be resisted as it is hazardous to the mental and physical health of those around. Dance however, can happen in public. In any case, when it is inappropriate to dance in public, I just go to the Ladies room. I actually used to do that in my previous workplace when I was brimming with giggly-ness. Pinky promise. And whatever you do, don't tell this anyone.

So back to my story. Affection is currently being showered upon five grain biscuits. They make my morning coffee so awesome, that I'm on sugar rush all day.

Coming back to tacky movie scenes, I'm having one heck of a movie marathon next weekend with Nautanki, Cow and other such losers. Be jealous ya'll! While you sit in the company of your tables and chairs watching Rajnikant and Govinda movies, I have friends who came out to me about their love for such nonsense. Now that we have formed a tacky movie club, we will never be alone in our endeavors.

I am also going for a play today. I bought these very awesome hippie pants the other day, straight fit with a  bandhini print. While my mum believes that it looks like I have wrapped my legs in a gift wrapping paper, I am convinced these are one of the coolest pants I have ever had. So cool that they have inspired me to go for the play. Today I'm going to wear my glasses, carry a jhola, sip chai, throw fancy words around and discuss the play like I'm some psuedo intellectual. Split personality I have no?

Glasses remind me, the other day I was walking down the street, and these two idiots start poking each others ribs and giggling. Then one of the says 'Jassi jaisi koi nahin'. Such a dirty look I gave him, I swear to god, he peed in his pants.

Then yesterday, I was standing at the bus stop and suddenly it decided to rain. You know it could have waited another five minutes. I would have reached home by then. But no! Since I'm usually too lazy to carry an umbrella, I pulled a newspaper out and kept it on top of my head. Firstly it prevented my hair from getting wet, secondly it made me look all smart and intellectual.
Apparently, a girl with a newspaper on her head is even more amusing than a girl with very huge glasses. All these shady people would stop in front of me for a second, stare with their eyes wide open and try not to giggle. How to live in a city with idiots like these?

Good news is, super awesome cat-eye glasses have found their way into my life. *burst into a very awesome dance routine* Apparently, my mum seems to agree with those who believe in these glasses are absolutely weird and is convinced her daughter will have to resort to shaadi.com if she continues to walk around like that. So while most people hide their lovers/ diaries/ stash of 'pron' from their mothers, I have been hiding my superawesome glasses, lest she gets a heart attack and loses hope even on shaadi.com.

That's all for today sexy people!
I'm going to go fix myself some equally sugary lunch.
Hugs and flying kisses for y'all!




3 comments:

Shreya said...

No no you only listen...

You are extremely cheap. Not like vulgar cheap, but cheap cheap because to entertain myself when you are around, i don't have to spend 35 bucks on that chindi daru bottle now on :D i can just pick up like a pack of sugar and looooooooooooooo our time at the tacky movie club meet is going to be made :]

Secondly, imagine what'll happen once shadyman nautanki gets those glasses and then sita gita and laxman do the rounds of lower parel :D :D :D

Thirdly, ITAM :O you do not hold a newspaper above your head BECAUSE PAPER IS NOT WATERPROOF! the print will run down upon you and you'll be kala khoon bhari maang :/

Fourthly, when your mommy is getting you enrolled on shadi.com, plis inform my mother too. or i could enroll onto jeevansathi.com we'll pick the better site after a bit of survey :] mommies happy, daughters nobody is bothered :/ anyway :D



OR YOU COULD, LIKE WE PLANNED, MARRY ME AND NIHIT ONLY. SIMPLE :]

malpani.!! said...

lol.. sugar gives u a high??.. dats nice.. and actually very inexpensive...:p

and those glasses are the IN thing i guess.. so let the people stare.. they are meant to attract attention..

o btw.. delhi was indeed fun..!!

n yes i know we get orange candy here too.. but having it at 12 o clock in the night was more fun..!!

o marine drive.. yep.. been der in my jai hind days!! but not lately.... care to company??

suruchi said...

Hi K-ay,
High on sugar n still looking gorgeous...
Kya raaz hain?:-)
Nice, fun n pacey read...
Almost like a peek into a youngster’s life...
N dancing in the ladies room, eh?
U sound like soooooooo much fun:-)