Myriad Shades of Happiness

Letters

2011-04-11T22:15:00.000+05:30

Faded black ink
On off-white sheets
The faint smell of nostalgia lingers
On these unsent letters

Transformed
To a time submenrged
Underneath a barrage of memories

I dust the reel
Melancholy is forgotten
Bits and pieces join together
I'm lost in the images

The sound of catalysis echoes
It got the better of you then
It got the better of me now

We created magic together
Until time got the better of us somehow

Bubbles

2011-04-04T20:03:00.003+05:30

There is a whole lot of darkness. And a little bit of light.
You can feel the wind blowing, when you stand on a height.
It brings a little bit of cheer. And a little bit of melancholy.
Together they live in my heart and challenge the very idea of harmony.
I'm singing songs. The happy and tragic sort.
I'm blowing bubbles. I'm bursting thoughts.
They are the same colour and somehow they look like different colours to me.
O ye, conflicting emotions, are you going to be the death of me?

The Queen of Cups

2011-03-27T11:02:00.000+05:30

I wake up.
To the smell of cinnamon incense.
I spread the cards before me.
They tell me a story.
A new one everyday.
Some dark, some strange, some fascinating.
I think I'm love.
With the world they build around me.
I anticipate the manifestation.
The fulfillment of the dream.
The Queen of Cups, she looks at me pensively.

There is a cupcake inside my cookie

2011-03-04T17:50:00.002+05:30

[Statutory Warning: The picture and title have absolutely nothing to do with the story]

I walk into the kitchen to see a big box of cookies lying on the table.
No, no. *Big* box of *big* cookies.
Giant size bites of happiness.
I almost felt like the chocolate chips on top were forming a face. :)
One that kept grinning at me excessively and idiotically.

I knew it that very moment.
The only place these cookies would look a little more delightful then they already do, was inside my stomach.
And for the first time in my life, I was taken over by feeling so strange that I'm not even sure it happened.
As soon as I had a couple of bites, I realized the cookies were almost too sweet for my tastebuds.
And all I could have was one.
ONE COOKIE.
I have never ever been repelled by sugar before. Ever ever ever.
Is it just me or is world actually actually taking somersaults?

Anyhooooow, I've recently learned the meaning of the word M.I.A.
Missing in action, for those dimmer than I am.
And I honestly think it's such a cool word that I'm going to disappear from blogspot every now and then just so I can come back and say: I'm so sorry! I've been MIA.

Now coming back to real reasons for why this post is being written.
The exams are coming closer.
The University ones.
Gaaaaaaaaaaah. *Makes a face*
And obviously all this time, while I was jobless I never had the urge to write
Not once.
Not twice.
Now that I know I'm supposed to be buring myself inside a pile of books until they form a fortress around me, I'm taken over by that irresistible urge to turn my stupid little thoughts into words.
Obviously there is a major dysfunction in the way I was made. *Dramatic sigh*
Why else would I ignore my blog when I have nothing to do and embrace it like my long lost husband when there are million things to do?

But, I have to admit.
Goddess of Nonsense Mrs Doodling Irrelevant Thoughts
Mrs = misses.
Get eeeeet?

I'd like act *Smug Muffin* and take full credit for that SofunnyIcouldLaughingandNeverRecover (or not) joke.
But the tragic truth is, that joke will never be mine.
One of my very awesome friend came up with it.
Also, what exactly does that say about my company?

Another friend of mine makes it a point to use '>.<' this emoticon every time he talks to me.
Emoticons are inspired by real life emotions.
However, our emotions are inspired by emoticons.
We've practising '>.<' look ever since.
The world must slow down it's suomersaults.
In case you're wondering what you're doing on the blog of a twelve year old, I thought I should make it a point to mention to you that I'm actually twenty.
Yes, two with a zero.
Wait, what? You would have never guessed?
Yeah, me neither.

I promise the next time I'm going to try to make some sense of what I say and sound very cool and twenty-ish.

*Doodles hearts*

Goodbye, cupcakes!

2011-01-26T22:19:00.000+05:30

There are people.
Lots of them.
Some old. And so many new.
Drastically different from each other.
Adorable in so many ways.

Then why do I feel the winds of emptiness are closing in on me.
I'm not sure what I'm seeking.
I'm not sure why it hasn't found me yet.
Perhaps, I'll just bury my nose in a book and escape reality for a bit.

Miksang and the fine art of Photography

2011-01-11T02:14:00.004+05:30

I have no hope, do I?
1.40 a.m . and here I am blogging.
What was I doing through the rest of the day?
Never mind.

I'm doing a photography course in college which I very excited about.
Creative people need newer outlets, right?
So I draw the curtians, pull the blanket and switch off the light.
My mind wanders.
The song from Coke's ad plays in my head. Aaj ki raat, koi aane ko hai.
The song somehow makes sense to me. Don't ask me to explain.
An image of the scarlet pleated pants I saw at Zara flash before my eyes. I should have just bought them, no?
They were fucking gorgeous.
I hear my brother singing somehwere in the background. I didn't know bathroom singers come alive at this time. Some of us are trying to sleep people!
Then I start to think of the jeggings I bought. I can't wait for it to be tomorrow. Only and only so I can wear them and walk around and take pictures.
And suddenly, I am wide awake.
Damn you, Miksang. You're the real cause of my insomnia.

Our assignment involves taking pictures with the unconscious mind.
On most days, my conscious mind is only half awake.
Having said that, I feel like Miksang was created for people like me.

The assignment is due tomorrow and I know I should have taken pictures a long time ago, but it's been a busy, busy week.
So I'm going to step out early in the morning and walk around places in this city I love the most.
The very thought of it makes me love the world a little more.

Until then, you treat your eyes to previously taken pictures that now qualify as Miksang.

Can you guess which one is my favourite?

The butterfly haze

2011-01-07T02:21:00.001+05:30

It’s 1.17 a.m. Looks like sleep has deluded me.I’m sleepy, but I’m awake.Like my mind refuses to go to sleep.

I must stop having dark chocolate. It sends sleep flying out of my window. It is times like these that I do the randomest of things.

There are a few beer bottles left over from new years. I’ve been pouring it on my hair ever since. Just before I take bath. It does wonders for my hair, I tell you.

It seemed like such a waste, though. To let my hair drink all of it. I decided I’m going to drink it instead.

I love my alcohol, but when it comes to beer, the mere taste of it makes me want to hurl. I've always wanted to know what the big deal about this golden-brown liquid is, anyway. I closed my eyes and gulped a few sips down.

Alcohol bottles sitting at the back of my closet usually spell trouble. And I’m not the usual sharabi ladki who sneaks bottles in and drinks them at inappropriate hours. It’s a little hard to get rid of these bottles, though. New years left me with a bunch of good memories. Funny, I haven't spoken about it at all.

I like playing hostess. I just get a little worried about calling a bunch of people who have never seen each other, even on Facebook. What’s a host got to do if the guests won’t talk? I wish I was an awkward moment breaker. But in most cases I end up being the creator. I can be socially retarded like that.

As it ends up I’m just one among a lot of other socially awkward beings. I’m not saying all of my friends are like that, I’m just saying I have a few of my kind around. What happens when you put them in one room? You have a party you’re going to remember for a while.

While I’d like to believe I did make a good host, I have random memories of jumping around the house in a pair of grey stockings and yellow bunny rabbit ears. Having friends like these also means you’re allowed to wear whatever the hell you want.

In the bargain, I shamelessly forgot to order food. Or make some for that matter. We survived on Saloni’s pizzas and Avanti’s nutella sandwich.

Sugar rush is an awesome thing I tell you. Especially, if it hits you when you’re already high on alcohol. I was dancing to Sheila ki Jawani at 12 am. Item dancing. The spastic version. The sort when alcohol hits you and your limbs decide to go on a break.

There were conversations. Some emotional, some meaningful and some nonsensical and some downright hilarious. Apparently, there was singing as well. Right before I randomly fell asleep. Will you judge me if I tell you I sang ‘saat samundar par’?

Awesomeness that we are, Shreya and I party crashed as well. In the dead of the night. But we left as soon as we realised a) they were too old for us b) the aunties had too much cellulite on their thighs c) The music they were playing made it seem as if they were welcoming 2006. We slipped out quietly. Coke glasses in our hands. Her's ‘neat’. Mine ‘spiked’.

After all the little adventures, I finally properly fell asleep at 5 am, only to wake up to a happy-yappy me.

It’s going to be a good year. Don't you think so? *grins*

Frayed Dreams

2011-01-06T01:05:00.002+05:30

Another set of dreams,
I seamlessly spin.
With smoke, dust and smoke,
They fade into a night so grim.

I seek the light.
I chase the day.
I begin to wonder,
If I'm running or running away?

As the dust and smoke,
Start to fade away,
I live in wonder and amazement,
Are all hopes meant to fray?

A little birdie named Item

2011-01-05T20:41:00.001+05:30

Much too much awesomeness. Much 'two' much.
The new year is here with its shine and sparkle, and let's just say, I'm very excited.
It's graduation taaaaayme.
Two months, baby.

Am I happy?
<refer to the above>
Do I have no other feelings?
<refer to the line below>

I have too much love in my heart for this city.
Well, it has given me a lot.
Yes, it's cheesy mode for now.
But the bird must fly out of her nests to explore other nests and meet other birds and eat other worms.
It is time.

So, I'm going to go on a University googling spree.
I've already spoken to a few people, who have provided me with very sane advice on which Unis to apply to.
May be I will go abroad, may be I won't.
I suddenly have the urge to stay in India for a bit.
Before I find saxy husband and fly off to a land far, far away.

Too much daydreaminess for now.
You know, I'm going to miss college.
I never thought I'd say that.
Stupid KC made me fall in love.

Anyhow, I'm very excited for Grad-day, eventhough it is far-far away.
Sexy black robes and even sexier dresses underneath.
It will be uber-awesome.
I'm telling you.

Happy 2011, y'all!

Kitschy dreams

2010-12-15T19:20:00.000+05:30

If there is something I hate more than people who wear grey and cream together, is being absolutely jobless. Staring into space. Changing channels on the television. Refreshing my Facebook page again and again. It makes me feel like a married aunty whose sits around waiting for her husband to get back from work. And I don’t have a husband also. You see where this is going?

So a while ago, when Wastey tells me there is work opportunity for the two of us, I put on my prettiest shoes and run towards my new workplace in slow motion. Instant love connection happened. And I’ve been running to work and college and back to work ever since. While I do miss randomly hanging out after college, I could not be happier.

Working here also makes me feel a little Konkona SenSharma in Wake Up Sid. I always envisioned that kind of life for myself. Living independently and writing about things I love the most. I’m graduating in six months. May be that life is not so far away.

Speaking of Wake Up Sid and husband, I almost fell in love with Ranbir Kapoor every time he stepped out with his camera.

Then again, there are a lot of things about the movie that made me fall in love. Remember Konkona’s off-white kurta with the little camels all over it? I liked it so much I painted my very own version of that kurta. Except, I replaced the camels with ‘banjaaran’. I love being gypsy-ish like that.

I love how the entire movie had such a kitschy feel to it. Right from her bedroom to the Mumbai Beat office. My office looks a little bit like, with random colours splashed all over the place. May be that’s another reason I love coming here as much as I do.

P.S. Did I tell you, I went to Chor Bazaar to do a story? ^_^

_______________________________________________________________________________

My brother and I talk sometimes. He does most of the talking. I pretend to listen for a while and then give that ‘are you suffering from verbal diarrhea look?’

A few weeks ago, he came running into my room saying he had to rush. I gave him the most disgruntled look ever, followed by a very long lecture. Reason? He was wearing a pair checkered shorts and a striped t-shirt. Just because they had the same colours, he thought it was socially acceptable to step out like that. What is a girl supposed to do when she sees such blasphemy being committed before her own eyes? He left me with no choice.

Yesterday we were walking home and he was telling me about how he thinks he is having a ‘hukka phase’. He was looking at me for some sort of sane advice. Stuff like stop destroying your lungs or I’m going to tell mommy.

Instead I look at him with a straight face. ‘Suit Yourself’. Those were my words of advice.

‘Tell me something! Scream at me!’

‘You can do whatever you want as long as you’re not doing in a pair of checkered shorts and striped tee.’

It was my brother’s turn to look at me absolutely straight faced.

The Airport: Scene 1

2010-11-13T17:43:00.003+05:30

Airports and I, we share a love hate relationship. Every time I touch the airport, I’m filled with a strange rush of excitement and anticipation. When you think of the surprises that lie ahead, it’s hard not to love the place for what it offers.

For a girl who has grown up on a steady diet of rom-coms, I firmly believe airports are the best place to kickstart your love story. Have a good look at my profile. Favourite movies? When Harry met Sally, A Lot like Love and Hum Tum. And that is just as much as I love airports. Not to mention, 68.4373% (Yes, I made the figure up) of these romcoms end with one of the actors confessing their undying love for the other, at the airport, minutes before departure.

What do I hate about airports? Three things. The checking, the checking and the checking. How did I forget the long lines? For a person who hates standing in a line when there are five people ahead, waiting for thirty of them to move, is a real task. On top of that parents insist on travelling with their little kids, who insist on crying for no particular reason. They make me hate the world so much. Even more when they stand behind me, grabbing my ass at regular intervals.

Don’t get me started on my own parents. Their worst fear is being trapped in a foreign country with no Indian food to sustain them. Vegetarian food to be precise. So while we’re waiting in the line, they start having in depth conversations about the different ready to make MTR packets and lolas (Sindhi pancakes) they have carried. All of this happens very loudly, by the way, while I stand there wondering why the ground won’t open to swallow me up.

This time round, I’m travelling without my folks and my excitement is contagious. The times I have travelled without them, there has always been a friend. Let me tell you about this friend of mine. Her parents compete with mine in the paranoia department. When we were fifteen and travelling without them for the first time, they insisted on informing the airport staff so they’d look after us. I’m not going to divulge the details of what followed, for my own sake.

I’m the kind of person, who continues to sit whilst the train arrives, and gets up once everybody else has alighted. Coming early to the airport, in my opinion, is one the most pointless things in the world. This time round, I’m so excited, I’ll probably insist on reaching five hours in advance.

The thought of browsing through duty free shops and bookstores in my pretty sailor striped ballerinas and black high waist skirt seems rather exhilarating. Have I told you about my new Zara bag? Let’s just say she is stylish and fabulous. I can’t wait to walk around the airport with her. And then sit by the pretty little airport cafe sipping lattes. For as long as time will permit me.

(To be continued.........)

Mislaid tracks

2010-10-26T11:44:00.000+05:30

Empty impending silences.
Long pauses.
Blank spaces.
White paper.
Mislaid tracks.

A pen in my hand.
I write the story,
Of the path ahead.
I lose the parchment.
Where am I going?

Monicaaaa, oh my darling!

2010-10-20T01:25:00.001+05:30

Goddess of Nonsense. She loves you. No reaaally.
Why else would she be writing this post one day before her board exams?
It seems weirdly incomplete to go write this paper without blogging before hand.
I need you guys to wish me all the love and luck, yea?
And I'll will send each one of you homemade brownies.
With a personalized heart shaped thank you letter.
And, no! None of you will die after you consume them.

Anyway, speaking of the exams, I'm surprisingly calm about them.
Jumpy calm.
The sort that makes me want to sing, 'Monicaaaaaaa, my darling' in the middle of my paper.
I swear, when I was writing my prelim paper, every time an answer I knew well would be asked, my head would automatically start playing this song.
Now, I'm just hoping my paper is *filled* with Monica moments.

When I found out what my centre is, I wanted to laugh and cry at the same time.
I'm going back to my junior college to the exams.
<Insert more yay-ness here>

I'm getting daydreamy again.
Nine days, and then I will be free to do all the little nonsense I've been aching to for weeks now.
*Grins at the thought of Diwali vacations*
There is *so* much that needs to be done.
I'm going to start with making lists.

You make a list of the kinds of brownies you want.
Baking lessons are sitting comfortable somewhere on the list!

The box.

2010-10-13T00:09:00.000+05:30

Anger
Lust
Sorrow
Disgust

Castaway.
In a box
Full of your memories.

In the deep recesses
Of the attic,
They lie with the sundries.

Inexplicable.
Then why do I feel
So emotionally insane?

If I throw away
The little boxes,
Will the memories remain?

Sell your soul for favourite quotes!

2010-10-06T21:30:00.000+05:30

You know those shady love stories where you chase somebody for sooooo long and realise when you're taking saat pheras around the fire that you are actually in love with your best friend, who's cat also treats you like a part of the family. Yes *that* friend who's been around for so long that you can't even remember what life was like without him. And then you turn around one-eighty degrees, make a dramatic exit from your own wedding, red saree flowing, strands of hair flying, gold jewellery clanking, while the band-baja wala suddenly stops playing the shehnai. All the people stand up and look at you pretending to be surprised while they're actually wondering, 'Omg does the bride's exit mean, we get absolutely no free food?'

But that is not the point of this story. What happens is that right after the bride goes running out she gets into the first cab she finds and tells the cabbie to take her to the airport/ bus stop/ station where her best friend (secretly her lover) is leaving for a fake trip to Ghaziabad/ Ambala/ Tiruchirapalli to set up a papad factory. Just when the train arrives he sees her running dramatically towards him. He throws his bag and runs towards her in slow motion. In the next scene they're siting by the same fire, with the same pandit, the same psychobabble, and the same red saree (What a cheapskate the director is). The only different thing is that, there are no guests in this wedding. They already ate free food at the previous one. So they're basically not invited.

Aye! Shady guests are trying to get crash this blog post again! Getting to the point.The favourite quotes section on Facebook has always been around, looking at me lovingly, affectionately and patiently, while I shamelessly ignored it and flirted with every other application there was. Now that I have rediscovered it's awesomeness, I'm taking this relationship to a whole new level.

I may sound uber cool as I throw phrases like 'a whole new level', but truth be told it is just another phrase for stalkerishness. Let me explain a typical conversation between me and my friend Parinita, from Improper Conduct (we have just entered into an It's complicated relationship on FB, btw).

Me: <Psychobabble at it's best>

Pari: HAHAHA!

Me: Favourite quotes? ^_^

Didn't get eeeet? Haw :O Let me explain.

Basically for every funny thing I say, I torture her to put it up in her favourite quotes section.

Currently, the success rate is 2 to 1,00,000. Yes, that funny and thaaaaat stalkerish I am.

Anywaaaaaay, so we're both walking to the station today and we're making a list of tacky things to do on my birthday (next blog post that =D ), so I suggest that we sit on the footpath and take shots. Every shot should be followed by a very tacky secret. Then I go on to explain with an example.

Me: Saaaay, when I was ten or something, I thought Suniel Shetty was hot. For a day.

Pari: Hahahahaha! Don't tell anyone my tacky secret.

Me: What? What? What?

Pari: When I was a kid, I thought Jitendra was hot! (And I laugh as I type this!)

Me: If and when I find you an item, I will ask him to dress in all white and ask you out! I will also get him to play a tacky Jitendra film song in the background!

When I told her about my very tacky secret, part of me was relieved because I finally got it out. Another part of me regretted it deeply. For once, *she* screamed 'favourite quotes!' and I wasn't sure if I wanted the world to know this about me. On the other hand, with my new found commitment to the favourite quotes section, it seemed stupid to let this opportunity go to waste. I was torn.

I decided to put my love interest first. Who cares what the world thinks when he is by my side? The quote must go up!

I was super worried she would change her mind by the time she got home. So I took control of the situation.

Enter: Reverse Psychology.

Me: You *cannot* put this up!

Pari: I *so* can!

Me: Pari, I will *die* of embarassment.

Pari: Yea, that is the point!!

Me: No, Pari, No!

Pari: Yes! Yes! Yes!

My plan worked like magic. By the time I came home, there I was, smiling back at me from her favourite quotes. That didn't make any sense, no? Well, as long as you know what I'm trying to say, you grammar whore!

Aaaaanyway, the point is, I am made of awesome and there is no denying that.

To explain this further, I'd like to cite another example.

I was talking to Pranav from For The Wine, yesterday and we were discussing our college festival and all the drama that comes with it.

Me: And N was telling me that M thinks, the fest is her pitajee ka property!

P: Haha! Yes, I've hearing the same thing over and over again.

Me: I was very offended when I heard that.

P: Ouch. Why?

Me: Chauvinism has sunk to every level! Why can't the fest be Matajee ka property?!

P: Hahahahahaha!

Me: Favourite quotes!

And awesomeness that he is, actually went and put my quote up there! Two three tear drops came rolling down my eyes.

Anywaaay, speaking of coolness, awesomeness, (insert 4-5 synonyms here), Parinita and I decided to tell you only half the truth! We conveniently changed some of our quotes to make them a little cooler than they sounded then.

Pari: Wait that didn't sound right!

Me: Oh yea!

Pari: (thinking deeply)

Me: Here's an idea.

Pari: Say say say!

Me: Let's rig our favourite quotes!

Pari: Hahaha! I'm not putting that up but!

Mental Spam

2010-10-04T03:01:00.000+05:30

Instability
Emptiness
Dark shadows

Written, unwritten verses
Spoken, unspoken words

Spam,
It feels like mental spam,
These obsessive destructive thoughts.

Dark shadows of the past
Loom in the present

You're gone.
But when I wake up every morning,
Why does this room still smell of you?

I wish upon a star

2010-10-03T20:06:00.003+05:30

I'm happy and daydreamy.
Happy, lost and daydreamy.
Daydreamy, lost and happy.

I have an Indian Regional Journalism paper tomorrow that involves learning a lot of dates, names and statistics.
It wouldn't have been so hard, if I had paid attention.
But sadness makes me daydreamy. Happiness makes makes me daydreamy. Sitting in class makes me daydreamy.
Rainbows, butterflies and balloons.

Also, thinking about my birthday makes me very daydreamy.
It's just around the corner and I'm a little more excited than I should be.
Turning twenty should make me sane, right?
It seems to be having the reverse effect on me.

What am I doing on my birthday?
Ummm... putting on a really tiny dress, having a little more than ten shots and dancing on the top of a table in a random bar?
Yeah, right.
My birthday had to plonk itself right in the middle of prelims and boards.
Foooooo!
Which basically means, there are no plans.

I suppose I could wake up and do every random thing that crosses my head.
Thank god for retarded friends?
Fes!
I'm going to let them figure, while dig into brownies and chocolate cake.
And a tiny word of advice, no tacky gifts from Dombivali, ok? *makes a dirty face*

I've been thinking about what I really want for my birthday.
For starters, a pair of very pretty and ridiculously expensive pair of Zara Heels should suffice.
I'm always stalking people to take pictures for my blog.
It would be so nice to have an awesome camera myself.
Not to mention, photography skills.
May be I'll get one of those fancy cameras myself.

I also want to wake up every morning like I'm on sugar rush.
Realise another one of those dreams, I see through the day.
I want to make place for new things. New people.
Ask everything that has no place here, to go find a new home.

"Do I know? Yes, I do.
I won't say it. Why won't you?"

Nonsense. Goddess of Nonsense.

2010-09-30T17:14:00.000+05:30

One day before my prelim paper, I bury my notes, hide all of my books and swallow my biting conscience. Why? So I could entertain all seventy five of you. And another 25 odd followers who stalk my blog regularly, but refuse to follow. I decide to spend the 57.23 good minutes of my evening writing a blogpost, and I have absolutely no comments! Zero. Zilch. Shunya. Have you been hit by a bus? Better still, *run over*? Well, if you haven't, I hope you do! All seventy five of you! Grrrrr.

Anyway. There is yet another paper tomorrow and I'm giving into the temptation. Damn you blogspot! I'm going to sue you if I don't do well.

Looks like I forgot to mention Facebook? Oh.my.GOD. One notification after another. One pointless conversation after another. Aaaa! Mental spam.

On top of that, something very amusing I read on Facebook struck me during the paper. Mental giggle fest I went on. That was right before mental giggle fest #2, which happened as a result of a friend mentioning something else that happened on Facebook. All that, while I'm trying to remember answers that I didn't study. Why? Ummm because I was on Facebook.

But for a good two hours yesterday Facebook evaded me. That's when Gtalk stepped in. It's so much better to talk without worrying about the person on the other end dying for a minute or two ever now and then. Apparently, matchmaking is my exam stressbuster. I've been trying very hard to set one of my friends up. Who you may ask? Well, lets call him Champu Scooterwala, a.k.a log mujhe pyaar se Scoooooter bulate hai.

Me: I want to keeeeeeeeel somebody!

Scooter: Who ser?

Me: Well, for starters I could kill you.

Scooter: But, if you kill me what will happen to 'the plan'? (the plan being me setting him up with another friend)

Me: It's a dead plan! You killed it a looooong time ago. You will die a virgin! I promise you.

S: Why sir? :( (yes, he refers to me as sir. He's is very cool like that)

Me: Because you haven't asked her out yet!

S: I will. Give me exactly two weeks, sir.

Me: TWO WEEKS? Omg you need more time?

S: Uh you want to me to ask her out now?

Me: THAT DOESN'T SOUND LIKE A BAD IDEA!

S: But sir! Build up hona chahiya na!

Me: I'LL CREATE THE BUILD UP?

S: No sir! I will.

Me: WHEN?AFTER TWO YEARS?

S: No no! Today!

Me: LIAR!

S: I promise!

Me: Kalank!

S: Arrey! I said na, todaaaay.

Me: Thoooooo!

Very happening life I have.

Anyway, I'm going to go study now.

P.S. I'm going to marry the owner of Theobroma and then have an extramarital affair with owner of Cafe Moshe. Wheeeeeeee!

Post IV blues.

2010-09-30T00:40:00.001+05:30

It's been too long, sir. Waaaaay too long. And what better time that the day before your prelims, to revisit? It's been eventful. It's been uneventful. It's been many things.

Funny, I haven't spoken about the trip at all. With my whole anti-college phase going on, I didn't think I'd be happy sitting in a train with 120 people, who I have to try very hard not to slap. Yes, I sometimes feel I'm cooler than a lot of people. Deal with it.
You know what I like the most about these college trips? They're absolutely random. You're packing your bag, calling all of your friends, making mental notes about what you're going to do. And then bam! The trip happens. And everything goes against your little plan. Sometimes it's just disastrous. But most of the time it's turns out to be surprisingly awesome.

I'm walking towards the hotel lobby from the gardens. There is a little lake on the way, with very noisy ducks inside. They were on sugar rush, I suppose (or whatever they get high on) and kept me distracted for a while. Good thing I didn't notice the empty swing that kept uniformly moving until I was almost out of the darkness. What is so strange about an empty swing moving in the darkness? Well, creepy to say the least, especially if the one next to it, isn't moving at all. Also, I should tell you this. There was no wind. Not even a bit.
I wanted to scream, but I ran instead. Adrenaline rush. All the way till I reached my room. Surely, I couldn't have imagined it. I go around telling the story. Ghost stories never fail to fascinate, no? At two a.m. in the morning, eight of us, in the middle of a 'tales of the Satan' session decide, nothing could possibly make this more fun than going ghost hunting at the hour of the Satan. What follows is a lot of screaming, nail biting, false alarms and panic attacks on the way to the scene of errr...horror.
The next day we discovered that the swing continues to move for atleast fifteen minutes after the swinger(what are they called) gets off the swing. But that night, we were so caught up in the frenzy, we lost every bit of our reasoning. And I'm so glad we did. We had one heck of an adventurous night.

Nothing beats drunks nights though. One minute you're in your room having shots and woo-ing like a mad woman and the next minute, you are... Okay, what happened next minute? Why won't somebody tell me? Actually you'd rather not. I don't want in detailed stories of how I embarrased myself. Let's just say two boys weren't enough to drag me back to my room. It took fours of them, a girl and a very awkward conversation in the lift. Oh btw, I was asleep when this happened. So I am in complete denial about all of this.
Clearly they couln't decide who was worse? A very annoying, shrill, shrieky, woman who kept wooooo-ing at random intervals, said way too many things, most of which made no sense at all, and embarrased a lot of other people by telling them who she wanted to set them up with (I am a matchmaker when I'm drunk). Also, I fell asleep on a random bench, somehwere along the way, with my hair all over my face. A lot of people mistook me for a ghost. Six and half shots of vodka. Two and a half shots of gin. Apparently, there is a lot alcohol can make you do.

And then I bonded with nice people, crashed random parties, spoke to a lot of people I had never spoken to before. I also danced around in circles like a mad woman on DJ night and scandalised every onlooker.

And I had decided none of this when I was packing.

I had my low-days and 'I want to kill somebody now' moments. I also, had my 'why did I come for this stupid trip?' moments.

But almost a month after the trip is over, the sweet aftertaste is all that remains.

Jassi Jaisi koi nahin

2010-08-22T12:07:00.001+05:30

It's a bright yellow Sunday morning, I'm so giggly, you'll think I'm in one of those Juhi Chawla- Ravina Tandon type movies and a very hairy Sunny Deol/ Anil Kapoor has climbed up my window with love note in one hand and shady red roses in the other.

But the truth is, Anil Kapoor or no Anil Kapoor, life must go on. Other replacements have been found. And I spend my days showering my affection upon them.

Apparently, sugar can do to me, what alcohol cannot. While most people are ready to take their clothes off after a few shots, I look at them wide eyed, feeling more sane and sober than I ever did, wondering what the hell my body is made of. On the other hand, when I'm high on sugar, the above mentioned giggly-ness happens. Jokes that are otherwise too sidey to be cracked in public are suddenly out in the open. The random urge to break into song and dance takes over. The urge to sing must be resisted as it is hazardous to the mental and physical health of those around. Dance however, can happen in public. In any case, when it is inappropriate to dance in public, I just go to the Ladies room. I actually used to do that in my previous workplace when I was brimming with giggly-ness. Pinky promise. And whatever you do, don't tell this anyone.

So back to my story. Affection is currently being showered upon five grain biscuits. They make my morning coffee so awesome, that I'm on sugar rush all day.

Coming back to tacky movie scenes, I'm having one heck of a movie marathon next weekend with Nautanki, Cow and other such losers. Be jealous ya'll! While you sit in the company of your tables and chairs watching Rajnikant and Govinda movies, I have friends who came out to me about their love for such nonsense. Now that we have formed a tacky movie club, we will never be alone in our endeavors.

I am also going for a play today. I bought these very awesome hippie pants the other day, straight fit with a bandhini print. While my mum believes that it looks like I have wrapped my legs in a gift wrapping paper, I am convinced these are one of the coolest pants I have ever had. So cool that they have inspired me to go for the play. Today I'm going to wear my glasses, carry a jhola, sip chai, throw fancy words around and discuss the play like I'm some psuedo intellectual. Split personality I have no?

Glasses remind me, the other day I was walking down the street, and these two idiots start poking each others ribs and giggling. Then one of the says 'Jassi jaisi koi nahin'. Such a dirty look I gave him, I swear to god, he peed in his pants.

Then yesterday, I was standing at the bus stop and suddenly it decided to rain. You know it could have waited another five minutes. I would have reached home by then. But no! Since I'm usually too lazy to carry an umbrella, I pulled a newspaper out and kept it on top of my head. Firstly it prevented my hair from getting wet, secondly it made me look all smart and intellectual.

Apparently, a girl with a newspaper on her head is even more amusing than a girl with very huge glasses. All these shady people would stop in front of me for a second, stare with their eyes wide open and try not to giggle. How to live in a city with idiots like these?

Good news is, super awesome cat-eye glasses have found their way into my life. *burst into a very awesome dance routine* Apparently, my mum seems to agree with those who believe in these glasses are absolutely weird and is convinced her daughter will have to resort to shaadi.com if she continues to walk around like that. So while most people hide their lovers/ diaries/ stash of 'pron' from their mothers, I have been hiding my superawesome glasses, lest she gets a heart attack and loses hope even on shaadi.com.

That's all for today sexy people!

I'm going to go fix myself some equally sugary lunch.

Hugs and flying kisses for y'all!

Betty, I have superpowers.

2010-08-15T22:07:00.000+05:30

Being with a bunch of insane people has it’s advantages. In my case, it opens parts of my brain that have been unused for so long that even fungi is ashamed to grow on it.

Anyway, I’m walking down the bridge with S and N, intently discussing shady movie scenes from c-grade films when I accidentally step into a puddle. It actually took me back to the time I was about six or seven. If there is a substance my brain is made of, I’m sure it’s called element random!

Anyway, so back then I used to stay over at my aunt’s place every other weekend. Majestic ground floor apartment it was, with a huge compound that led to the beach. During the monsoons, it looked much nicer than it actually was. It’s a hardly a surprise that I wanted to spend all of my time there.

So one of those rainy days, I put on a nice pink skirt and blouse and stepped out looking all happy and pretty in order to jump in and out of the puddle. Reason? Well I wanted to pretend like I was being shot for a Kodak commercial. Every now and then I would stop and repeat, ‘Kodak moments-jeevan ke haseen palon ke liye’. Yes I had a tag line and all for my advertisement. I was such a cool kid. It’s not even funny.

My aunt had a maid by the name Betty. She was as lost and day-dreamy as I am. I’d tell her the silliest things and not a word from her mouth. One evening the two of us were sitting in the compound, people we were stepping in and out of their cars. A wedding was taking place at the other end of the compound. I obviously wanted to sit there and stare at all the ladies, who were walking around with enough bling on them to put women in soap operas to shame. Betty, on the other hand, had better to things to do. I *had* to make her stay somehow, so I decided to engage her in a conversation.

Me: Betty I have superpowers.

B: Hmmm.

Me: I do Betty. A lot of us are born with them.

Then inhaled deeply and acted like I was channelling energy from the Universe, but I was really just trying to cook a story up.

Me: In my case, I can look at people and know what their names are.

Betty: Hmmm.

Me: Like that woman there, in the pink saree, her name is Laxmi. Can you see the woman in the green saree? She’s Sarita. Yes.

Betty: Hmmm

Me: The couple there, it’s a little hard. I think they know I’m trying to find out what their names are.

Betty: Hmmm

Me: Harish. Definitely. I think the lady is Chandra. No, no! Asha. Yes, she had me confused for a minute. (My attempt to sound more realistic)

While, I don’t know if Betty paid heed to a word I said, I thoroughly had fun making these stories up.

There is however one thing Betty loved more than spacing out. Kissan ketchup. True story. She was always waiting for us to get out of the house so she could get her hands on that bottle. One day when they left me alone with her, I decided to play god. I pretended like I was leaving as well.

As soon as she stepped into the kitchen, I sneaked up on her. “Betty, I’m Jesus Christ. I know you’ve been finishing the ketchup in their house and you must know that I will punish you for your wrong doings.”

And just like that I ran out of the house, only to appear in half an hour. Well, you know if I came in right away, she would have known it’s me.

Anyway, the ketchup stealing never stopped. Either she knew it was me or she was just too dazed to pay any heed to the voices around her. But I’ve got to thank the Lady for making my life more colourful. She helped me acquire the art of cooking up nonsensical stories early in life.

Self help books and Shopping Lists.

2010-08-01T23:24:00.001+05:30

Sexy Ladies log and garma-garam Gentlemen (Of course, I use this term very loosely),

Welcome to a very Polka -dotted Technicoloured Dreams, which as you know, will not be Technicoloured Dreams for a very long time. Let's say this ever so awesome blog needs a change. I'm done talking about the future. From this day onwards it's going to be about 'now'. You know like those pseudo-intellectuals who write self help books like 'the Power of Now' and all that. In case, you guys didn't know, I judge anybody and everybody standing ten feet around the self-help section in bookstores. As for those who write them, I think there's a special place reserved for them in 'Loserville'. Yeeeny-way, has it occured to you that irrelevant is my middle name?

Coming back to my blog name. I want something that sounds super-awesome, you know. And for the lovely person who does come up with a name for ze blog-ness, I will find you super-awesome husbaaand/ wifey for them. Weirdoooo Guy (my phace-book hus-band), if you're reading this, this does *not* apply to you. *Evil laughter*

Since irrelevant talks seems to be the order of the day, can I make a shopping list now? Pretty, pink please, with chocolate butter and cheese :D *Looks at people running away and decides to shut up*
Anyway here it goes,

Sexy cotton kurtas. Is there a book on how to be a droolworthy journo? Well, if there was one, you know what would top the list :)
Patialas. To go with kurtas ofcourse.
Technicoloured dhoti pants. Because they are the love <3
Tank tops in every colour. To go with the pants.
Scarves/ dupattas. Because every journo must have them.
Indian chappals. Well it would go with everything I mentioned here.
Elephant earrings :D
Oxidised silver jewellery *dances at the thought*

And now for my non-journo-ish Lust list :

Brogues! I want them! I need them! I must have them! Or else I will die.
Purple Mary janes!
Silverish grey gladiators.
And finally a purple one shoulder dress.
Oh and one of those black french caps that Sonam is wearing in the Aisha promo. Actually, why not just have her entire closet, no? *grins from ear to ear*

Wow, my list is unusuaallly small, isn't it? I must be improving. :O

Before I leave, I want to thank the lovely Me-era with the award she presented me with earlier today. It put me in super-eeeee mood and inspired me to get back to abondoned blog. And here I am, promising, no pinky promising that I'm going to back with more.

Until Abhay Deol continues to be the second ideal husband!

xoxo

Defeat in the Land of Rimbos

2010-07-24T22:06:00.006+05:30

I went to this Sobo bakery the other day to pick up a couple of things for home. This place is classy, quaint and perfect for a date. No such luck in my case though. I went there with my dad and my brother. The place was empty except for two couples. Funny how somebody sitting up there wanted to rub it in?

I went to this Sobo bakery the other day to pick up a couple of things from home. Ah the sight and smell of the cocoa beans. That place is perfect I tell you. Date kind of perfect. No such luck in my case though.

While prying and eavesdropping are generally on the top of my priority list, I was too busy picking out brownies to observe who was sitting around me. Five minutes later, a friend of mine pats me on the back. How could I have not noticed her all that while? Did I tell you I love their brownies enough to get a tattoo on me that says that?

cute guy sitting on the corner table did actually manage to get my attention for a second or two. I hadn’t bothered to observe who he was with. Ends up he up was there with that friend of mine, let’s call her Snitch (rhyming with another word we’re all familiar with). At this point I thought, He who lives upstairs is but a cruel man.

You know what I hate the most about morning lectures? The fact that I am forced to run out of the house without so much as taking a bath (things you’re not supposed to tell anyone). On the days I don’t wash my hair, it sort of resembles a beehive. And if I were to leave it open, you’d fear bees would come buzzing out and attack you any minute. So I had tied it up in what I’d call a sorry excuse for a bun and paraded around in my oversized glasses. On top of that I was wearing my mum’s kurta that basically hung loosely over me. That too over a peasant skirt. Yea, I do that sometimes. Partly because I live to make nonsensical combinations like that, but mostly because pulling on skinny jeans in the morning is way too much of an effort. So when she stood in front of me looking all nice and pretty with her makeup and perfectly set hair, I could actually hear his cruel laughter ringing in my ears.

Now let’s go into flashback mode.

Snitch and Kay used to be very good friends. Back then she was just an oversized sidekick with no dressing sense. Kay of course, was quite the opposite. She was the girl with the cool clothes, a gang of friends who adored her and indefinable thing going on with this boy we shall refer to as Loser (makes the L sign). All of this made Snitch a jealous little cow. Dear Hindu gods, do not wage a war against me.

So seeing Snitch there with her arm candy, lead to a serious case of dumpey-ness. For god’s sake, I was wishing my life was like the girl, who spent all her time trying to be like me. It took my quarter life crisis to a whole new level.

hich brings me to the question, what is so attractive about Rimbos (raven haired bimbos) anyway? Their lack of intelligence, personality or both? Oh wait! Their well endowed twin assets more than make up for it, don’t they?

In the Land of Rimbos, I accept defeat. I’m going to pull my sweatpants on, dig into a bowl of ice-cream, chic-flick style and watch movies back to back. On days like these men like of Rajat Kapoor, Abhay Deol and Rahul Bose give hope. Atleast, there are a few desi items who refuse to pick silicone over substance.

Quarter life crisis and sexy-sexy (non-existent) boyfriends!

2010-07-12T01:06:00.001+05:30

My pumpkin pies!

I think Quarter life crisis has struck me bad! While it's obviously one of the worst things to happen, a teeny tiny part of me, loves how filmy it makes my life sound. Well, Chic-flickish to be precise. So grab a bowl of popcorn and listen to me rant rather dramatically about why the feeling of dumpey-ness has been shamelessly following me around.

Well, I used to think I was the 'girl with the plan'. I'm suddenly not so sure anymore. If I don't spend the rest of my life writing, my soul will die and disintegrate. But if I spend my entire life only writing and nothing else, then my self worth with die and disentegrate. I will wake up every morning, feeling like a useless, worthless, potato of a person who has done nothing. Achieved nothing! So I have a long list of other things that I simply have to do. But the list is so long that I don't know how I'm going to do all of it. If I pay more attention to one, I'll feel like I'm neglecting the other. If I try to do the thing I'm neglecting, there will be some fifty other things biting me slowly at the back of my head leading to a serious cause of mental explosion. And if I try to do justice to all of them, my entire being will die and disintegrate. All that and more before I'm old enough to suffer from mid-life crisis!

Omg! This system! So much pressure! I don't even know what PG program I am going to do next year. Or which Universities I should be looking at. Should I even be doing a PG program next year or should I jump to join the first company that offers me an amazing job? Should I work and then study? Study and then work? Or should I work, study and handle being a bag-wali side by side?

What about money? Will I make enough to live the life of a splurgina? Will I find happiness in whatever I do? Will I be healthy at the same time? Or will I find a desk job that swells me to the size of a char bacho wali ma? Will I find a hot-as-hell boyfriend? Will I move in with him or get married right away? Will I find a sexy-sexy husband or will I have to depend on my folks to hook me up with a rich balding guy who'll throw a lavish wedding in return for pressing his feet for the rest of my life and running towards him with a glass of water everytime he screams Lajo-Lajo(or whatever shady name he'll come up with) ?

So as of now, I basically feel like the dumpey protagonist, who is sitting on an arm chair wearing pink sweatpants, stuffing herself with her 48th bowl of chocolate ice-cream and listening to some very melancholy music, worrying herself sick about how and when and where and if and but , everything will fall into place.

But but but, since it is a chick-flick, everything has to get sorted out no? So let's say the gorgeous actress will wake up to find a swanky pink car in her garage, an appointment letter from Vogue sitting by her bedside and drop dead gorgeous boy, who has climbed in through the window to confess his undying love for her. The two of them will break into song and dance. The heavens will bring forth rain in the hot Summer. Everybody will live happily ever after!

And that my dear friends is the end of my story.
So long!
More wishful thinking later :D

Of Nostalgia and the rains

2010-07-07T14:45:00.001+05:30

On most days, I feel like I'm pretty strong.
But on days like these, I marvel at how I manage to fool myself.

All I want to do right now, is curl into a big arm chair with a steaming cup of hot chocolate, so I can have you sit next to me and talk about all the things I love, while watch that rain go pitter-patter from my window sill.

Funny thing this nostalgia.
It makes the most disconnected souls crave for familiarity and for love.

How to feel less dumpy 101

2010-07-04T19:48:00.000+05:30

Dear ______(Insert favourite dessert here),
Since, it's a Sunday afternoon and I don't particularly have any brunches or wine and cheese parties to attend. Detoxification and all that. Or the fact that I *never* get invited to one of those. I am going to sit here and share some very important gyaan with you. A dear friend of mine mailed me about about how she felt down in the dumps. Now, I am almost always trying to make my life sounds as awesome as I can possibly can. But I must admit, this dump-ey feeling hasn't spared me either. So before I reply to her mail, I dedicate this post to everybody who has absolutely worthless. Presenting how to feel less dump-ey 101.

Rule no #1. Chocolate is the God of foods. Depression always leads to emotional eating. Which leads to a not so attractive belly. Which further leads finding, a not attractive at all boy-frand! So find that piece of heaven. Preferable a dark chocolate one. You know, lesser calories and all of that. And promise yourself that one bar is *all* it takes.

Rule no #2. Yeh Rishtaaa kya kehlaaaa-taa hai! Heard that before? Vaguely? Indian soaps are the bestest no? Plop into the sofa, give your grandmommy company and prepare to be thoroughly entertained. When the the lead actress, acts( I use the term very loosely) oh-so-dramatic and voices her opinion on how she worries about women who don't wear sindhoors and mangal sutras, your problem will seem trivial!

Rule no #3. Open your eyes to technicoloured dreams. And this how I subtly do the PR for my blog. Ok fine, that was a shady one! Getting back to anti-dumpey-ness. Colours are therapeutic. They are mood uplifters. They are make the world as beautiful as it is. So that pair of cream shorts and grey sweatshirt goes where it belongs. The wastebin! Find the prettiest, most colourful dress. Match it with a super dhinchak pair of ballerinas. Watch that grin becoming bigger and bigger. I'm not sure guys should try this though. Govinda look alikes are not my type. Or anybody's type for that matter.

Rule no#4. Sales, freebies and discounts. The thrill of paying less for the same amount of stuff. Priceless! Go to the nearest mall, ask the salesperson, 'discount kis par milega' and voila! Happiness has been found.

Rule no#5. Google is God. My awesome friend Shreya from 'Such a Cow' has a thing for this Australian cricketers. I wont tell you his name because I'm frankly too cool to remember. But she googles his name every now and then to check out hot pictures, the world wide web has to offer. And when she is tired of leching at his images, she starts googling random phirangs. That girl, I tell you! Anyway, since sweat-soaked sportsmen are not my type, I urge to search images of Rajat Kapoor instead. *hearts skips a beat* Ain't I dramatic?

Rule no#6. It's time to be booty-ful. While Google is the God of pictures, Youtube is the God of videos. When I feel dumpey, I type two magical words- belly and dance. What follows is an hour long session of mirror entertainment. The sort that would earn me coins and coins in dollars and pounds. So I suggest you you google your favourite dance form and move to the awesome beats. If you are just not as gifted as I am, ganpati-visarjan dance videos are plenty. There is hope for everybody in this world.

Rule no#7. K-ay is awesome. Well everybody on blogspot seems to be talking about how awesome they are. I do not want to be left out in this race. I'd like to leave you with perhaps the most important rule. Keep visiting my blog every now and then. The gyaan you will find here will help you counteract all your grumpiness and dumpiness!

Until, cheesy lines continue to be the source of my inspiration!

xoxo

Like strands of silver hair

2010-07-02T21:35:00.002+05:30

I was an awkward kid, hiding behind these oversized Harry Potter glasses, when it was cool to wear tiny rimless frames. When I hit puberty, I finally convinced my parents to let me wear contact lenses on a regular basis.

Every school has labels. I don’t particularly remember being the cool kid, until I bid farewell to that hideous obstructive piece of eyewear that sat on the top of my nose. The day I embraced contacts, I saw this sudden transformation in my personality. I felt as if I was finally comfortable with who I was. Or so I thought.

My glasses then started playing hide and seek with the outside world. On the rare occasions, that I wore my glasses outside of the four walls of my house, I was restless and uncomfortable. It was like going back to being the little girl I so despised.

And then a little while ago another transformation came about. I found my soul-glasses just when I had given up. A gorgeous pair of black and blue wayfarers. I felt unusually drawn towards them to the extent that my contacts started to take a back seat in my life. Nowadays, when I am forced to embrace them again, I find myself ill at ease. I suppose I grew out of glasses just to grow fond of them again.

And why is any of this relevant? Because, I see this as an ultimate acceptance of who I am. Like an old woman who sports her silver strands as sign of the wisdom she has collected over the ages, I am going to sport these insanely quirky glasses, like they are an integral part of me.

Victory

2010-07-02T12:41:00.000+05:30

While some people have their fairy tale endings, others wait endlessly for their perfect someone to come along. And then there are those of us who hold onto the wrong person because we convince ourselves that they are the epitome of perfection.

It’s been a year since I let you step in. It’s been a year since I let you step out. It’s amazing how I found the strength to do the one thing I never thought I would.

But my greatest strength lies in the fact that when I picture perfection, I don’t see you in the frame anymore. Nor do I hold onto the illusion that someday who will step back into my life to help me find that perfection I yearn for.

May be I have finally grown up. I suppose you have too. I always thought our paths would intersect someday. But time has made us grow further apart. May be we were never meant to be on the same road.

And for the sake of my fans, I am back! I am back.

2010-06-14T21:20:00.004+05:30

My cinnamon laced almond muffins,

Missed me much?
Well, if you refuse to say yes, I refuse to entertain you henceforth.
If you must know, k-ay has been rather busy.
Just when the summer was about to end, the two of us fell in love.

I made so many bags, that bachas have started calling me bag-wali aunty.
Ok not really.
But they will ok?
Someday!

Then I put these very awesome salwar pants up on the blog.
I'm telling you justice exists in this world.
Some very sexy people placed an order also.
May their lives be full of happiness and awesome, awesome friends like me.

So basically Purple Peeptoes has been taking over my life.
That is why I see you less and less.

Other than that, college started.
Now I feel all awesome and Journo.
I put my nose up in the air and look down at everybody.
They're all juniors.
Chota bachas!
TYs like us can act cool and own the place.
Well, you only get a year to act like that so might as well take full advantage no?

Plus, it's so much cooler to look down at people when you're wearing oversized glasses, no?
The geeks are back nigga.
And this time, they're going to take over the world!

Also, this journo thing makes me want to tell all my saxy saxy clothes to go on a mini vacation, while I don some very awesome kurtas and jholas.
That way I can parade around with my bags and do free publicity also.
Such a business woman I am!
At this rate don't be surprised if you see me running around the local train compartment screaming 'deee-jay-ner jhola. Paaanch so rupaiya'.
What a saxy bagwali I will make no?

On that note I shall leave.
But before that, kindly visit I'm too Sexy for my Shirt !

Shameless blog publicist I bees.
In my defense, it consists of my khoon paseena.

Until Rajat Kapoor make my heart beat <3
xoxo

My Nomadic Love

2010-05-28T17:49:00.001+05:30

Ever heard a piece of music that took you to another place. Another time.
Ever looked into the eyes of a stranger who seemed more familiar than all the people you have ever known?
Ever had a eerie dream that seemed more real than most dreams have?
Ever wondered why we don't leave our past where it belongs?
Doesn't it fascinate you how it finds it's way into our lives through the conscious, the subconcious and every other medium it can find?

Ever asked yourself who you really are?
Where do you really belong?

I have.
I don't belong here.
I don't belong anywhere.
And yet I belong in every place the sun rises and the stars shine.

I want to grab a bag, pack it with the things I love the most and fly off to another land, with a stranger who harbours the same dreams as I do.
I want to be gypsy.
A nomadic gypsy.
For it is who I have been in another life.
Who I wish to be in this life.

I'll dance and sing along the way, and weave beautiful lines about my journey.
I'll meditate by the shore during the day, and talk to the angels and fairies at night.
May be I'll cast my own Wiccan circle.
I'll look at my coffee cup in the morning and have all the answers I seek.

I'll surround myself with myriad colours until a strange sort of peace descends upon me.
I'll learn about herbs, about plants and the fine art of healing the soul.
I'll train under a master, until I know all the secrets of the Universe.
May be I'll belly dance until my soles hurt and my heart starts to dance to a brand new rhythm.

Grab my hand.
I'll grab yours too.
I don't know if you're my soulmate.
Or just another stranger to me.
But this journey is way too beautiful for me to live it alone.
While I can't say that I belong to you, I promise to journey with you.
Till the very end.

The Summer and I, we have made our peace.

2010-05-27T12:45:00.001+05:30

I kicked.
I punched.
I grumbled, wailed, threw a fit and then poked the Summer where it hurts the most.

However, now that we have made our peace, I'm collecting all the destructive forces, brewing inside of me, for the day I go meet my boss.
Work until graduation apparently.
Which means she wants me to work another year.
FOR FREE.
And I will do what any other self-respecting woman in my place would.
Refuse to work in a place where I am not valued enough to be bloody paid for conveyance.
Let's see if you find a cooler intern, niggah!
Because from what I can see, you're going down!

There is also a lot of constructive energy bubbling inside.
What's better than to dedicate this energy to learning all the creepy stuff that I love so much.
I'm learning a new pack of Tarot cards.
The Osho Zen pack and it is making me very, very happy.

Generally, I give readings over the phone, but yesterday a friend of mine, stuck in the middle of some serious relationship crisis came over for a reading.
I cannot tell you how I got totally carried away, went into this fortune teller mode, lectured her unto eternity about the state of her life and where she ought to take it from there.
It was very satisfying, you know.
Blabbering away as if I really had all the gyaan in the world.

And then I took some very important decisions.
Whilst, digging my closet for an old shrug, I fumbled upon this very pretty black and golden scarf I was gifted a long time ago.
It's got ancient egyptian symbols on it and a very pretty looking sun right in the centre.
If all else fails, I'm going to put that scarf around me, find myself a pair creepy looking cat-eye glasses and a hundred bangles and beads in every colour, until I look like one of those gypsy fortune tellers from a Hollywood movie.
Then I will buy an old wooden stool, find a lonely corner on the beautiful streets of Bombay, set up a stall called K-ay's Corner and become the pioneer of tarot readings on the street.
Only for those who are willing to pay me but.

So money problems will be solved.
Creepy urges will be satisfied.
The Summer and I, will be best friends again!
Happy ending :D

P.S. I'd be more than happy to give readings to all my faithful blog readers :D
If you're too broke to pay me by cash or cheque, you can sed me bars of Bournville in every flavour!
Peace!

Finding The Mystical Mermaid

2010-05-21T20:50:00.001+05:30

'It's called Maya', she whispered.
I had known it all along.
I just chose not to believe it.

Ever held onto to something unreal, only because it made you happy?
I did.
But in that moment I let it rain.
I wanted to banish the misty clouds that blurred my vision, only to be able to think.
Think clearly once again.

There were no tears.
There wasn't a smile either.
I felt like the stoaic I never was.

I packed everything and I left.
What I seeked the most I could not find here.
I ran until I reached my haven in the middle of the ocean.
The waves raged on.
The bridge was flooded.
But the noise inside my head was louder than the noise around.
And I knew I had to make it there for my mind to find it's peace again.

I sat there.
Legs crossed, hand by my side, breathing deeply.
The noise started to fade until there was comlete silence.
I was finally at peace with myself.
The Zen mode she talked about had been achieved.

When I spoke to her for the first time, I was 16 and still trying to find my Faith.
But today as I meditated in peace, every word she told me finally made perfect sense.
'Spirituality can exist without Religion,
But Religion cannot exist without Spirituality.'

pokes Summer 2010 where it hurts the most

2010-05-21T14:35:00.000+05:30

Dear Summer 2010,

At first I couldn't wait for you to get here.
College drama was overwhelming.
I was in dire need of a sabbatical.
To cut myself from the all the people who meant nothing at all to me, but affected me anyway.
I wanted to drown myself in work so much so that the World I left behind was a distant memory.

Right now, I'm thinking about how I can't wait to get back to the normalcy of life.
May be that will be my sabbatical from this sabbatical gone wrong.
I need to wake up late.
Take an hour to get ready.
Shower 54 different colours on me.
Go sit on the second last bench against the wall.
Daydream with my eyes wide open.
Laugh like an ass at nothing at all.
Grumble about stale KC food.
Have showdowns over the lamest projects.
Bitch endless with A-a-sha.
Go shopping five times a week.
Make Firangi Paani plans that never materialise.
Aaaah!

And did I mention I need another sabbatical to cleanse my muddled up head of the boy drama thats happening.
Girl meets boy.
Boy disappears.
Girl meets boy.
Then he disappears.
Girl meets boys.
And then he dissapears AGAIN.
Girl meets boy.
She should knife poke him all over until he bleeds, scoop his eyes out, step on his hairy humungous feet and then pull all his hair out of his scalp.
But all she does is think about is how she wants to meet him again, lest he disappears.
I must stop living on a staple diet of movies like Love Aaj Kal and A Lot like Love.
NOW!

Until sample sales continue to make happy!

K-ay <3

Summer 2010

2010-05-13T20:01:00.000+05:30

I think it's going to be a good Summer.
Random, inspirational, adventerous and very creative.

I started working full time at the office.
With college, I could only manage to come in after lunch.
I like the sort of discipline it brought with it.
Waking up early, sleeping before 12 am, eating on time and all that.
I wasn't sure what I was doing writing about celebs I hardly care about, but I enjoyed every bit of it.
I felt like I was living someone else's life.
One of those starstruck journalists who actually care if Ranbir and Katrina are going out or what Akshay Kumar is doing on his birthday.
Everytime I wrote a story, I thoroughly enjoyed spicing it up and sensationalising it, while laughing in my head at all those dimwits who actually wake up every morning to enthusiastically read what I have written.
I know this is not what I want to spend the rest of my life doing, so I'm going to make the most of it while it lasts.

There is just one miniscule problem.
I have too many things sitting on the top of my priority list.
And giving so much to a company that refuses to pay seems like such a let down.
So I tell her that this isn't working out for me and I'm going to work from home instead.
Which basically means I get to write for them, attend important events and still find the time to do all the other stuff I've always wanted to.

Works for me!
I can finally hunt down those photographers who promised they'd let me be their stylist.
I plan to stand outside their doors singing until they get tired of terrible voice, agree to employ me AND pay me.
I've also become a bag-wali off late.
No I don't stand at the station and sell bags.
A store in bandra does it for me.
Now I want to get back to it and get the second lot made.
More belly dancing will happen.
Lucky women will get to learn to groove like me.

I'm also feeling very DIY.
I've moved into my new house and I want my new room to be *beautiful*.
So beautiful that magazines will want to feature it!
Okay. I'm pushing it now.
But I'm thinking of getting a wooden chair that I'll paint myself.
I want to get wall paintings, collages, photographs done.
I want the wall to look insane!
And I'm thinking of making some wall hangings as well.
Crazy suggestions are always welcome :)
Also if you're looking to employ someone AND pay them, you *must* leave a comment asap!

Shopping List - May'10

2010-05-13T19:06:00.000+05:30

Every month deserves a new shopping list, no?
I'm already half way through May and I haven't managed to shop much.
The parents are worried.
This behavioral pattern has never been observed before.
So without further ado, I'm going do what I do best.
Make shopping lists for myself!

Cat-eye glasses.
Ethnic rings.
Cane bag (which I want to paint myself)
Colourful scarves.
Hairbands.
New pair of jeans.
White kurta.
Long black vest.
Deep purple nail paint.
Green patiala.
And some very pretty ballerinas!

The adventures of my day!

2010-05-06T00:25:00.002+05:30

It's been an adventurous day cupcakes!
Action packed would be more appropriate.
I make the guards chase me at work today.
I'm too cool to carry my ID card around.
So I walk in like I own the place and pretend like my ears have lost the ability to hear when they call out to me.
And when they do that right after I have made eye-contact with them, I give them my very famous 'nari morcha aandolan' looks.
It makes the coolest of men pee in their pants.
And today there were three of them.
Four if you count the fat on number #3 's body.
That's how many men it takes to scare this girl.

So they stood seena-taanke, by the gate, waiting to attack me.
'ID dikhao', one of them said.
I didn't bat an eyelash.
I kept walking straight.
Then two people at the reception asked me for my ID.
I blatantly ignored them and kept walking as fast as me feet would take me.
Then the two watchmen standing near the lift suddenly realise what is going on and start walking towards me.
I look left, I look right.
One of the five lifts open.
From the corner of my eyes I see all the watchmen running towards me so I make a dash for the lift that opens, laughing wildly as the lift door shuts on their bloody faces.

So I reach the fifth floor feeling very proud of myself.
You'd think the oldies would let this little kid live in peace, buthe makes it a point to call up the fifth floor watchman instead.
Then my life all of a sudden seemed very movie-ish.
The watchmen whispered on the phone, while surreptitiously looking at me.
I tried to pull the door open, but it wouldn't budge!
So much for escaping the law.

But am I the sort of woman who would resign to the likes of unhealthy, oversized men?
Men in general, actually.
No! no!
That is not what I have been brought into this world to do.
I patiently waited for a moment.
'Tumhara naam kya hai', he asked me.
'Ravneet', I replied. And no that isn't my name.
I was just trying to bluff him.
He didn't look convinced.
I didn't know what else to do.

But even Destiny was in favour of the strong woman who stood up for herself.
The door all the way across opened.
One of the employees was stepping out.
I ran. Ran with all my might, all the way till I reached my desk.
Only then did I breath a sigh of relief.
And this my friends, were the adventures of my day!

I remembered to forget the end.

2010-05-04T17:06:00.000+05:30

The words unwritten

The words unsaid

The incomplete conversations

They come back in my head

And I find myself yearning

For the familiarity of that smoky smell

Craving for the touch

That can take me to heaven and to hell

And then the treacherous lies

Comes back to me

I see the end of the road

Through a hazy smokescreen

I fumble to collect the pieces

As they fall apart in front of me

May be I can’t remember the end

Because it wasn’t meant to be

Embarrassing incidents from my interesting life

2010-05-03T17:02:00.000+05:30

My Jelly beans!
It's been a long time, hasn't it?
This time I'm back with the promise of nonsensical updates every other day, starting today.
I've been embarrassing myself a *lot* these days.
Then again, when do I not?
But no matter how much I embarrass myself, I don't really get embarrassed.
Get what I mean?
Oh well! I'm just going to get to my story.

So the day ends and I'm very, very impatient to get back home.
I come running out of the door and make a dash for the elevator.
This random person standing by the elevator, tries to control his laughter as I almost slip while doing so.
I refuse to smile at such smart asses and walk straight into the lift.
Suddenly, it feels as if the elevator is taking *way* too long to get to the ground floor.
It starts to get a little awkward, so I decided I should pull my cell phone out in order to look busy.
I dig my hands into my pocket in order to pull my phone out and kaboom!
I drop it on the way and my phone lies on the elevator floor in three pieces.

On the way to work the other day I decided to start being a little sensitive to things like skin tanning and skin cancer.
I'm too lazy to use sun block most of the time.
I wasn't even carrying one the day I decided to protect myself from the sun.
But I did have my my white rimmed, very retro looking sunglasses and my red polka dotted scarf.
So I put my sunglasses on and attempted to neatly wrap the scarf around myself such that my entire face is covered.
I failed miserably.
So I just put the scarf around my head and pulled it down to cover my face the way women covered their faces with their pallus in the olden times.
The funny thing was I wasn't wearing a saree.
I wasn't even wearing a kurta.
And I shamelessly walked around the streets with a red polka dotted face, providing a lot of amusement to the onlookers.
Well, didn't I tell you?
I hardly ever get embarrassed. =D

I eat a lot of junk, you know.
And I'm seriously trying to cut down on that.
I bought bananas on the way to work, so I could have them instead of inhaling my 468th cup of coffee.
And also because it makes me feel rather smug about having included a fruit in my daily diet.
So in the evening, whilst the tummy starts to growl, I pull the banana out of the bag and start peeling it.
It was a safe time to indulge in fruits that make dirty people think dirty thoughts, mostly because no one was around.
Half way through, the boy who sits opposite me and visits his desk for not more than five minutes during the day decides this is the perfect time to get back to work.
Then the boy who sits all the way on the other side decides he has some very important information to share so he comes and hits who who sits across and they both stand up and start excitedly talking about god-knows-what while my half eaten banana sits in my hand.
They both peer over at what's in my hand.
Then there is silence.
Story of my life.

Despair

2010-04-16T12:34:00.007+05:30

Remember the time I told you guys I had a photography project and needed some ideas.

Well, here's what I clicked.

Not too professional or anything.

But i hope I conveyed despair well.

let me know what you think.

Love Happened.

2010-04-06T10:52:00.008+05:30

Out of all the things that have me kicked out of my mind, stalking stylish people for my blog is the ultimate.
Uploading their pictures and acting like some self-proclaimed expert comes number two on the list.
Need I mention getting models all decked up with what I have picked, while they go prissy and pouty in front of the camera?
And then there's a kick, that surpasses all of the above.
What can I tell you Niggas?
Love is happening!
Saxy boyfrand hasn't come along yet, but for now another sort of love will suffice.

A Journalist from Tehelka called me up the other day and said she is doing a feature of fashion Bloggers in the country and wanted to feature my blog as well.
Relentless flow of tears happened.
Yes I'm melodramatic like that.

So she called me up for an interview and to be honest I felt quite celebrity-ish.
I didn't know how long it would be until I get another shot at this, so I took the opportunity to rant as much as I can and pretend like all the gyaan in the world was sitting that brain of mine.

To top it all, there was a fancy photoshoot and all.
And I was the model for a change.
Of course, I went totally over the top, pulled on a pair of yellow net stockings, wore a floral hippie skirt, yellow tank top, pink ruffled waistcoat, golden ballerinas, loads of pink accessories and viola!
The shoot was so much fun I tell you!
We went to Dhobi Ghat.
I'm going to skip the part where we got visually molested, almost slipped a hundred times and left the place with drops of soapy water stains all over our dresses.

This was followed by a shoot on Mahalaxmi bridge.
We clicked some pictures on the road, standing on the divider, crossing the road, standing against the railing and all that.
Again celebrity-ish-ness happened.
Hope the pictures come out well.
I'll post a link here!
And for those of you who haven't visited the Blog yet, you must click here!
___________________________________________________

Now speaking of love, I must confess that my love-hate relationship with gladiators has finally come to an end!
It's love, love and just love now.
I bought this awesome pair of black ankle length gladiators the other day, with bronze studs all over them.
I haven't taken them off ever since.
Not even in my sleep.

___________________________________________________

That's all for now, my chocolate coated Muffins.
I've changed my name from lavender to K-ay because it's closer to my name and Lavender is just something I randomly picked for the lack of something better.
When people call me Lavender, it feels a bit strange.
It reminds me of one of those characters from a 17th century novel, dressed in a white gown with exaggerated puff sleeves and sitting in a carriage waiting for prince charming to come along.
Real name is not a good option, because if ze relatives will go on a name googling spree and come across this Blog either, life will be over before it even starts!
So K-ay its is as of now!
Have a colourful week!
See you around more often!
xo

Terrorists, Feminists, maggi and other things!

2010-03-30T23:58:00.002+05:30

My brother thinks I would make an awesome terrorist. Or I’m secretly one and I haven’t told them yet.

Every time I make him study, he literally pees in his pants. I scream loud enough for my relatives on the other side of town to hear me. In my defence, his important- information retention capacity is less than mine. Will to daydream? Far greater. Results? Disastrous!

Apart from his I-will-remember-just-one-line-from-a-one page-answer attitude, his love for all things made of maida puts me off. Why eat white bread and Maggi, when you can have whole wheat bread and whole wheat pasta instead? Apparently, he doesn’t think so. He continues to consume slices after slices of bread loaded with cheese. His daily diet involves literally inhaling bowls of Maggi. At odd hours of the day, that too. Result? More screaming, hair pulling and name calling.

One of my uncles took a Korean wife. The woman makes me respect Korean culture. Every time she has to enthuse her tiny two-year old daughter about something, she screams, ‘Womens’ liberation’ and the delighted daughter throws her hands up and starts jumping immediately. Now the Feminist that I am, this practice has left me absolutely fascinated. I’m inspired to instil the same value in my children.

This of course, makes my maida-loving brother think I am creepier than I actually am. He swore to my mum the other day that he won’t let his kids get anywhere close to me. For one, he didn’t want his kids screaming ‘Women’s Liberation’ at random intervals. Secondly, he didn’t want them to be deprived of the pleasures of digging into a bowl of Maggi.

Do you know what that means? I will be deprived of a chance to instil my deep rooted values in the minds of little children who have descended from the same blood line as I have. Generations after them will be brought up without the knowledge that women infact are the superior sex! My only hope is that another revolutionary in the family will be born. She will change the way the entire family thinks and complete the mission I was sent here to start!

Getting back to my brother, he had another amusing thing to say. He’d like to keep his children away from mine. He also intends to train them in Martial Arts, lest they ever have to deal with me. So on the rare occasions that his kids just have to meet mine, their conversation will be like this.

His kids: We know kung-fu, Karate and Tai chi!

My kids: We’re Karishma’s kids.

His kids: *Run away screaming*

And that is how the story ends.

What not to do when walking down the road.

2010-03-23T10:23:00.001+05:30

Hello lovely people,

It is amazing how the urge to blog is so strong when all I should be doing is burying my nose in my books and forgetting that there is a World that exists outside of where I live. Since this two track mind of mine chooses to do nothing more productive than daydream about what to eat in the next break or what to buy on the next shopping expedition, which as you know is the most integral part of my life, I’ve decided to shut my books and do something more productive with my life. They say there is no greater joy that the joy of sharing knowledge. Certain experiences in life have opened my eyes. And today, my dear readers, I am going to give to share with you the knowledge of ‘What not to do when waking on the road!’

Bursting into song while walking may not be the best thing to do if you’re walking with a friend. They will stop in their tracks, turn around and walk away so fast that you will left alone singing to yourself. And you know what that makes you? A loony!

If your daily adventures involve screaming ‘Aaaaaaaaaaa’ while crossing the road, as if you are having a near death experience, the results are worse. Your friends will swear by every idol in the temple, that they will henceforth never be seen with you in public.

If the sheer joy of bumping into a friend you haven’t seen in twenty four hours, makes you want to run towards them and scream ‘itaaaaam’, you must learn to exercise self control. The Rajus, Munnas and even Harilals on the pathway assume you’re screaming out them and start blushing almost instantaneously as they hand comb their hair in the rare view mirror of the nearest car.

Apparently, singing songs like ‘Billo Rani’ and ‘Kajra Re’ produce similar results.

If you have the irresistible urge to break into dance and you know you’re going to be disowned as you were, for singing out loud, always remember you live in a country where dancing on the streets is as commonplace men peeing on the railway tracks. If it’s not Ganesh Chaturty or Navratri, then it’s surely got to be somebody’s wedding day. What’s better than to join a crazy bunch of baraatis as they set the streets on fire? And while you’re at it, please, please don’t forget it’s an Indian wedding; nobody needs to know who you are because they will assume you belong to the other side. So make sure you attend the wedding as well and fill your plates with piles and piles of food before hitting the dessert counter.

Clicking pictures on the road is alright. Finding absurd locations like dampened walls and ancient looking buildings and then posing against them as if you were doing a photoshoot for Harper’s Bazaar is not. The kids on the street come running towards you, and surround you as if a real shoot is going on. Before you know, the tinier ones will be crawling up the photographer’s legs in an attempt to get his attention and convince him to take their pictures. Never mind that he is probably using the most obsolete digital camera that exists.

While indulging in acts of dog calling (male version of cat calling) refrain from screaming out lines like ‘kya maal hai’ by merely seeing the back of an ‘object’ (as I would like to refer to them). Sometimes, as these objects turn, the frontal view might shock you beyond belief.

And as I complete this very meaningful blogpost, I feel rather smug about having shared the kind of life changing experiences that nobody on blog spot has ever shared. Ever.

Now you can go to the comments section of this post and share with me how these words of wisdom have made a significant difference in your lives.

Because I belong here.

2010-03-18T18:25:00.003+05:30

The past two years have been a journey of sorts.
Miracles happen.
Sometimes even when you don't believe in them.
Mass media is something I've wanted to since I was 14.
At every stage in your life, you look at those above you and imagine living a life like theirs.
I'd look at the Xaviers' kids below my house in their kurtas, jholas and unruly hair and I just knew they belonged to BMM.
I couldn't wait to get to college, because I wanted my life to be just like theirs.

Sometimes, I still wake up in the morning feeling awestruck.
And rather happy.
As it turns out, my life is just the way I wanted it to be.
So I'm not your regular kurta and jhola girl.
I'm more of the kurta, jhola with a million blinding accessories girl.
But I love every bit of who I am and what I do.
I love every bit of what I see.
I love every bit of what I learn and I'm not even talking about the academics here.

Well, I am feeling particularly optimistic today.
But I'd be lying if I said there has not been a day when I've wanted to throw this life away and go off to another place.
A few projects have been sheer torture.
There have been days when sleep is a far off dream.
There have been times when I have had to work for hours on an end with some of the most uncooperative people you will ever meet.
I've also been manipulated and watched people grab the spotlight for something I spent hours on.

My first semester hasn't exactly been the sort of experience I'd want to gush about.
New place, new people, meaningless conversations and polite laughs.
It's an awful feeling to have to drag your feet every morning to a place you so despise.

But none of it matters anymore.
The memories I have of the semesters after the first, have more than made up for it.
I've had a chance to explore issues I care so deeply about.
I've had a chance to learn things about myself, I can't imagine my life without.

And I've met some great people.
The sort who I can look at when somebody stands up and says the most amusing words and share a stifled laugh.
The sort who get my totally ridiculous sense of humour and choose not to judge me for it.
The kind who'd listen to me rant endlessly about things they can't even bothered about.
All that really matters at the end of the day, is that I finally feel like I belong here.
And I look forward to every day because I know it's going to be better than the one that's gone.

Tomorrow is a new day.

2010-03-18T02:26:00.001+05:30

I feel so starstruck right now.
So awed at the World waiting outside of where I live.
So privileged that I got a taste of a World I could only dream of.

Lakme Fashion Week was like a dream come true.
Sky high heels, beautiful silhouettes, famous designers, celebrities, wine and cheese parties.
It was all larger than life.
Way too much if you ask me and very little at the same time.

I knew this isn't a once in a lifetime experience.
I knew that I don't want to be a silent spectator, viewing the lives of the rich and famous from the eyes of the media.
I want to be them.

Nor do I want to simply sit in the audience watching designers after designers display their collection.
I want to be able to get on to that ramp and take a bow after the models walk the ramp in my creations.
The instant I sat in the hall on the first day, I knew I wanted life to give me a chance to live like this.

For a while now I've felt a little hopeless.
I know I'll be a Journalism student next semester and it makes me really happy.
I guess it's what I have wanted to do since I got my first star in fourth grade an essay I can't remember.
It's the thought of what I want to do after graduation, that's been keeping me awake.

I'm so glad I have found my calling now.
The mere thought of it fills me so much excitement.
That's exactly how I want my life to be.
I want to wake up everyday waiting eagerly for what the day has to offer me.
There is so much learn.
There is so much to do.
I never want to stop being a student.

Tarot Predictions (March 2010)

2010-03-05T11:04:00.000+05:30

Aquarius.

Eight of wands.

Indicates something new and exciting is going to happen, the sort that will bowl you over with the speed at which it arrives. You will find things rapidly changing around you.

It also indicates good news and the birth of new ideas. Again you will be surprised at the pace at which they arrive. Opportunities will be plenty. They call for quick decisions and quick actions. If you put in all you have success will definitely be yours.

Two of Cups.

The two of cups are reinforcing the eight of Wands. Good tidings are on their way. The path to bliss and joy has been laid down. It is up to you to find it.

The cards also deal with emotions and love. While some experience emotional growth, others find things on the personal front better than ever before .Old relations are likely to grow strong. Newer relationships are likely to develop into meaningful relationships that will stay with you for a long time.

Another important aspect of this card is self-love. If you have been ignoring yourself lately, it is time you start being compassionate towards your own needs.

Judgement (reversed)

When you embark upon your journey, you may come across certain difficulties. They may be times when you feel like you’re trying to move ahead, but there are hindrances keeping you from doing so,

Reinforce your energy, double the efforts and embrace the power of positive thinking. Things will work like magic.

PISCES

Eight of cups.

This card is indicative of restlessness, the sort that is caused by worldly matters. At some point you may feel like you are growing weary of Worldly pursuits. Be careful of what you chase because many a times you realize what you have been chasing for so long is not worth it at all. You will find yourself in dire need of a break. A strong urge to embark a spiritual journey will follow.

Nine of swords

You might wake up overburdened by the weight of your worries. Though it may seem like everything is on the highway to hell, things will get better eventually. The loss and failure will provide you with an opportunity to grow.

Ten of Swords

Another indication of failure, loss and defeat. The feeling of stagnations looms. But the reason for the sudden negativity is you. You have given up when just when the goal was right around the corner. Though it seems like there is a long struggle ahead, the truth is most of it has already been fought. So keep moving forward. These may be trying times, but I assure you victory lies at the end of the road.

ARIES

Ace of Swords

The Ace of Swords is about courage and determination. It is about aggression and strategy. You will be faced with challenges. But the cards urge you to dive headlong into the pool of your fears. You have to take situations in your hands, because the swords are giving you the power. It is up to you to harness this power.

Queen of Wands

The Queen of Cups is a very positive card. With the power manifested in you by the Swords, your struggle will reap positive benefits. Success will be yours.

You will also find a lot of opportunities opening up for you, especially in terms of your career. The sudden outburst of ideas and your new found power will make you quite a Leader. People will be in awe of you.

Even on the personal front you will feel like a different person. You will find people drawn towards you as the fun side of your personality stands out more than ever before.

Justice (reversed)

You may find yourself subjected to a form of injustice. Things may suddenly go off course and seem quite out of your control.

At some level you will be dishonest to yourself as well. This is will cause unrest. The key is to remain calm and not let the negative emotions take charge of you. Thus you will deprive them of a medium to create upheaval.

You have the look at the higher purpose in whatever you do. Embrace the virtue of justice and mercy, when it comes to yourself and others and things will get back on course before you know it.

CANCER

Knights of Cups (reversed)

This card talks about emotional imbalance, the sort that is bowing you down and making you rather melancholy. You may feel like other are being unrealistic in their demands. It will lead to resentment, lies and manipulation. These are the things you should be most weary of. The trick of course, is to strike some sort of emotional balance. Be a little rational perhaps. It will give you the strength to stay afloat.

Page of swords

After the ambiguity created by the reversed Knight of Cups, the page of swords is like the shining light at the end of the tunnel. It talks about growth and improvement in all aspects of life.

It indicates Divine intervention. The card urges you to be more attentive to the intuitive mind. It will guide you in ways that will leave you absolutely surprised. You will find yourself reaching out to higher ideals.

It also reminds you of the manipulative side of people and how it can affect you. You should shield yourself from negativity and not let yourself be affected by gossip and ugly rumours.

The Heirophant

This card talks about structure, about Tradition and about rules. You may find the urge to revert back to old methods or to involve yourself in the process of learning. You may also feel the urge to embrace traditional forms of religion more than ever before.

This card also suggests that a certain male member of your family or a man in your life who is of the old school of thought and believes in being rather authoritive will influence your life in many ways. You must welcome the advice with open arms. It will reap long term benefits.

TAURUS

King of swords (Reversed)

You will be flooded with ideas. The goal will be clear. But don’t let the words, ‘dreamers are not always doers’ apply to you. At the same time, the negative energy around you may try to bow you down, as will the obstacles on your path. The answer is to align your focus, will and intelligence such that the path is cleared and the goal is achieved without any difficulty.

Seven of Pentacles

This card indicates the end of a back breaking endeavour and the beginning of a new phase, which is bound to invite a lot of positivity into your life. It is also a period of decision making. You have to be quite sure about the track you want to choose. Focus all your energy on the goal and leave it to the pentacles to manifest their power.

Eight of Cups

A lot of times you feel like you are still stuck in rewind mode. While, the Past is certainly beautiful, moving on is an inevitable part of our lives. This card urges you to embrace all the new things life has to offer, while letting go of all the things of the Past that you have been holding onto. It also urges you to let go of your inhibitions as the path ahead of you has many beautiful things to offer.

Six of Wands

The six talks symmetry. It makes things fall into place. So make sure you remain positive. Beautiful things will start to happen around you.

GEMINI

The Moon

The Moon is symbolic of creativity and intuition. It brings in a surge of emotions. You will feel more connected to the Divine than you ever have and it will show in your work. The Arts will draw you towards them. Those already in the field will see a lot of progress and fulfillment.

You will feel the urge to give up on your conventional beliefs. But remember to maintain a balance. And always bear a higher purpose in mind. This card also warns you to beware of enemies and falsehood.

Ten of Swords

You have overworked yourself. It is time to take that break and enjoy the fruits of your harvest.

Eight of Swords

This card indicates a phase in which you may feel trapped. You may feel like your vision is blurred and the path is unclear. The card urges you to look carefully. It may seem as if there is no way out of your dilemma, but there in fact is. You have to clear the clutter in your head and take a deep breath. The path will appear.

Queen of Cups

The Queen of Cups is an indication that the heart will reign over the head. You will be filled with a deep sense of love. The positivity you emanate will reflect on your personal relationships such that people will find themselves drawn towards you.

Intuition will play an important role in your life. You may also feel the urge to pursue the Arts.

When this card appears in a reading, it may also stand for a woman who is about to entering your life. She will be loving, caring, nurturing and change your life in more ways than one,

.

LEO

Four of Swords

The four of swords imply the person has grown rather weary of life. He is overburdened and in dire need of a break. It is a time to spend some time alone with yourself, reflecting and meditating in order to rejuvenate yourself.

The Wheel of Fortune

This is one of the luckiest cards in that pack. The divine energy has entered your life. A good phase is about to start. With Luck by your side, you must start every venture that you have been meaning to start. So while the Four of sword will leave you feeling a little negative, this card will bring in a surge of positivity.

Knight of Pentacles

The responsible side of you will take over. You will find yourself putting in a lot of efforts into every task at hand. You will also play the Leader and the Motivator. The only thing you have to keep in mind is to not only be a dreamer, but also a doer.

VIRGO

Eight of Pentacles

You have been concentrating on your work, so much so that it has become the sole focus of your life. Everything else has taken a backseat. But the result is going to make you feel like all your efforts are worth it. You will be rewarded, appreciated and recognized. Take some time off to celebrate.

Nine of Swords (reversed)

The Nine of Swords indicate the beginning of a bad phase, the sort that leaves you feeling trapped and suffocated. The reversed version of this card however indicates that even though things are not back on track yet, they will be. The bad phase has ended. You may not have healed completely, but the process has begun. You will emerge a new person.

King of Wands

You are likely to feel enthusiastic about a lot of things, as bout of creativity brings about positive changes in your work.

You will also feel like a bit of a motivator as you get others to work on the projects you head.

Girls under the influence of this sign are likely to meet someone who will sweep them off their feet with bouquets of roses and love quotes.

LIBRA

Four of Swords (reversed)

This card brings with itself a certain dark, gloomy feeling. Things on the personal front may not seem quite right. Relationships may suffer in the bargain. It is up to you to rise above all of it and take that extra effort to set things right again.

This card also calls for discretion in one’s dealings. We don’t know for sure who the enemy is.

The positive side of this card speaks about renewal. Something that ended a while ago, could be a relationship or a task at hand. There are bright chances it becomes an integral part of your life once again.

Two of Cups (reversed)

Change is inevitable and therefore must be accepted. Do not let yourself be thrown off course. Accept change in whichever form it comes. It may even appear to you in the form of separation. But you must keep in mind that Nature has a greater plan in mind for you.

The cards also urges you to let go of your inhibitions, worries or anything else that might keep you from moving forward.

The Heirophant

As The Heirophant, you will feel the urge to reach out to people. It reflects the selflessness in you as you play the role of a healer, advisor and counselor. In the process you will find yourself healed as well. A deep sense of satisfaction will follow.

Two of Pentacles

While the first two cards highlight a rather gloomy phase, this card brings in good tidings. Things will look up soon. There will be a progressive change in your life such that you will find yourself being able manage more than one task at hand. You will be surprised at your own enthusiasm and will power.

The change you start to see around you will make you stronger. You will start believing in yourself and start writing your Destiny with your own hands.

SCORPIO

Magician (reversed)

The times ahead do not bring the best of tidings. You may feel like you are entering a bad phase. While the Magician talks about manifesting your energy, the reversed magician talks about the lack of energy. You may feel like you are not in control of your life anymore, almost like you lack the power to set things right for yourself. Confusion and indecisiveness will bring about a negative feeling.

Three of Swords (reversed)

Feeling of loss and emptiness looms in the air. Something about the way you are dealing with your emotions isn’t quite right. Change is inevitable and loss is a part of this change. You must remind yourself to look at everything positively and think of that ray of hope at the end of that dark, gloomy tunnel. Make that conscious effort to stay considerably cheerful and focus on the finer aspects of life. It will bring you out of your state of confusion.

Eight of Swords

The card is indicative of the troubled times. It brings with itself that feeling of being trapped. When you keep trying to move forward but your objective is not clear, neither is your vision. But the truth about this card is, though most of the routes are blocked, there is a path that lies ahead. It calls for serious meditation and focus, so that the ambiguity clears itself and you can decide which way you want to go. Take sometime to off to reflect deeply and meditate. The path will appear before you. You will also feel a surge of positivity. The path will seem much easier.

SAGGITARIUS

Death

When this comes up in your reading, in very few cases does it actually imply Death. In most cases it implies the end of a phase and the beginning of the new one. It speaks of the inevitable, namely change, and urges you to embrace it whole heartedly because there is a plan for you and you will be pleasantly surprised.

Ace of Wands (Reversed)

At some level you may feel rather empty. You want things to change around you, but you’re not quite sure how to go about it. This may lead to dissatisfaction with life in general.

The good side of this card talks about how a period of unrest and confusion will end and how you will finally be at peace with yourself.

Page of Swords

This card talks about the awakening of the childlike side of you. You will suddenly find yourself feeling enthusiastic about a lot of things. You will be inquisitive and feel the urge to go back to learning. You will be so enthused that your ventures will leave you even more energetic than before.

CAPRICORN

Ten of Wands

You may reach a point where you will have grown absolutely weary of the World. You may feel like you are carrying an emotional baggage around. The urge to unload and go on a spiritual retreat is strong. You will find yourself craving for seclusion. Focus your energies on introspection. This will eventually bring about a significant change in your life.

For those who have been working too hard, this will be a phase of retribution. You will find your efforts being appreciated. The harvest will give you a deep sense of satisfaction.

Knight of Wands

This card is an indication of the fact that you may feel a little bit like a Knight in Shining armour. You will feel the strong urge to defend or protect the weak. You will find yourself standing up for all the things that you believe in.

You may also feel more attached to the people in your life. A sudden urge to be the reason for their happiness comes to you. You may feel drawn even to nature and realize how much you value the finer things in life.

Eight of Pentacles

For those who have been utterly faithful to their work, this is card reinforces the symbolic meaning of the ten of wands, saying that your efforts have not gone unnoticed. You will definitely be rewarded.

Shopping List!

2010-02-28T20:24:00.003+05:30

Every new month calls for a new shopping list. So now I'm just going to rant endlessly about all the silly little things I need to buy. Yes need. Because my existence seems meaningless without such material possessions. So if you have nothing useful to do right now, you can go over the shopping highlights of March 2010.

Jackets. I feel extremely jackety for some reason. I want long jackets, short jackets, sleeveless jackets, puff sleeved jackets, dull jackets, bright jackets, plain jackets, printed jackets, you name it.

Stockings. I want Black net stockings with a crazy print and I want it now!!!!! Do you hear me God? N.O.W. Oh and while you're at it, you can thrown one of each colour :D Stripped ones will also be appreciated.

Teeny tiny, yet very classy dresses to go with the stockings.

Juuuummmmmppppsuits! Everytime I see a girl wear a jumpsuit, my conscience screams, how dare you not possess one?! I'm usually so embarrassed I can't even face my closet for the next two hours.

Oh and loads and loads of pumps and Mary janes! I can't wear the stockings with chappals no?

Patiala. Green ones. And on sale preferably :P

Some very pretty puff sleeved blouses and pretty neck pieces to wear with them.

Of course I'd need a pair of new skinnies for the blouses. If I wear my old ones, the blouses will get offended na?

And finally some moneeeeyyyy!
And I give you a wonderful opportunity to contribute to "Lavender's Shopping Fund".
Click on the link to check out some pretty Indian bags that I'm retailing through my Blog and become one of the lucky winners to receive abundant blessings :D

Grumpiness personified.

2010-02-26T17:49:00.003+05:30

You know what I dont like?
Long boring meetings that never seem to end, while the sound of your growling stomache is audible in the next room and the weight of your droopy eyelids seem heavier than the weights you lifted in the morning?
No I don't really lift weights, but it seems awesome to pretend like I have a very healthy lifestyle with my daily visits to the gym and all.
I also know that I hardly sound funny when I'm this grumpy, but I need to vent so shut up and listen ok?
The meeting starts at 1.34 p.m. and drags on till 4.14 p.m.
Time of last meal : 10:14 a.m.
You know what long periods of no food does to me?
It makes me very, very cranky.
Did I mention snappy?
AND Slappy (Read: Irresistible urge to slap someone)!
Such a long pointless meeting ONLY so she could tell us that we have to spend the entire night in the office uploading 'live updates and snippets' on the website.
Try not to smirk ok?
I am as it is find the scenario very, very amusing.
The awards are being treated like Obama's presidential speech or the coverage of the 26/11 or something.
Obviously we have nothing better to do on a Saturday night than upload the shady winners of the Filmfare.
Fine! So I generally don't.
But that justifies nothing ok!
And it's not as if I didn't get it the first time she told me.
Or the time after that.
OR that.
OR THAT.
*sigh*
With all the ranting that I have done now, the grumpiness seems have lessened by 15.5 percent.
Have to leave for an event now, for which I am very excited(read: FREE cocktails).
Ok now that I'm having thoughts of pink martnis and lemon mojitos grumpiness have decreased by 85.5 percent.
On that note I shall leave.
See you later alligators!

For your ears only

2010-02-22T22:21:00.003+05:30

(The title of this post has been inspired from the shady Katrina-Akshay song -For your eyes only! :P)

Eavesdropping can provide you with entertainment even reality shows fail to.
A colleague (let's call her Mo) walked into our department for a tete-a-tete with the gang.
That or just to show off the shiny cluster of rocks that adorned her perfectly manicured fingers.
It was such an amusing conversation.
While the ladies were cooing over the new ring and pretending not to be jealous at all, she started sharing gyaan on how to have 'The Man' wrapped around your little finger.

Mo: Always play hard to get. If you want to be valued by your man, you should let him chase you. That's how they are, they like the chase! See how my jaan tries to woe me. (Thrusts the ring in their faces and then takes deep breath so she watch the expression on their faces change again.)

Sto: I've been married for less than a year! Why can't my husband woe me like this?

Mo: (Thoroughly enjoying the attention) Infact, he called me right now and said I should get away from work so we can go somewhere fancy and have lunch together.

Sto: Even my husband used to be like this, until marriage that is. Mujhe bahar jaana itna acha lagta hai. Now we don't even go out even on holidays. All he ever does is laze around the house!

Mo: That's because you don't know how to deal with him yaar. See, all I did was call him up and say 'I feel so unloved, like a Virgin' and within seconds he proposed the idea of going for a romantic lunch.

Sto: (Looks at her in awe)

Mo: Pata hai When he came back from Cochin after a week, I didn't even hug him. I just asked how the trip was and went back to watching tv.

Sto: Sach mein?

Mo: See if you want to be treated the way I am you have to learn to make yourself unavailable. Why are you running behind him all the time? You have to make HIM do that!

Sto: (Keeps looking at her in awe)

Mo: The second you stop thinking about him, he'll start thinking about YOU! Pata hai it is the Universal Law of Nature. (She exhaled and flipped her hair, having convinces herself She that she has shared the most profound knowledge of all time)

Didn't I tell u eavesdropping is so much fun?

Do you remember that day?

2010-02-13T11:35:00.003+05:30

Do you remember that rainy Monday afternoon.
It wasn't just another Monday afternoon was it?
It certainly didn't feel like that.
Not after what you told me the night before.

It was also the day I wore my new jeans with my Scottish pinafore.
I couldn't stop ranting about it.
It was so easy to talk to you about the most random things.
So easy infact, I don't think I gave you a chance to talk at all that day.
I knew you wanted to say something.
I wish I had let you say it.

Then we stepped out for a bit.
It was a break from the study session.
Never mind that the 'studies' bit was an just another excuse to see each other.
I had the irresistible urge to grab your hand and pull you into the rain.
I didn't know what I liked more...
The thought of feeling the rain on my skin or walking by your side in what seemed like the most magical rain of the season.

But you grabbed my hand and pulled me into the car instead.
You said something about not wanting me to wander alone in the rain.
And then you looked at me like you were about to say the same things you did the night before.
I know I wanted you to say them.
Though I wasn't sure if I wanted to hear them yet.
I don't know why we were always so unsure of ourselves.

I keep wondering till this day if things would have turned out differently, had I grabbed your hand and taken you away instead.
The 14 of Feb, is just around the corner, and I don't know if I should say this, but I'm going to miss you a little even if I deny it.

Awesome-ness!

2010-01-31T13:45:00.001+05:30

Hello Muffins!
Such a happy Sunday morning it is!
Well, I dragged myself out of bed and almost fainted looking at the mess around me.
What happens when a part of your closet(read clothes, shoes, jewelery, scarves, belts) is scattered on the bedroom floor, while the rest of it is sitting in three different bags, lying somewhere amidst the excessive clutter?
The mere thought of having to clean was putting me back to sleep.
Well my ideal Sunday mornings entail endless cups of Cappuccinos followed by absolutely delicious breakfast, while flipping through pages of the Brunch(HT supplement).
Grumbling over a backache caused by standing for long hours at the studio and walking around with a bag the size of a travel bag, is really not a plan for the plan.
Did I mention I had exactly half an hour to eat, get ready and clear the place up before I could leave for work?
And yes I did have the irresistible urge to slap myself for trying to be 'superwoman'.

But when I finally got here and logged onto the Indiatimes movies website, I couldn't stop grinning to myself.
Trying to handle college, endless projects with work, seemed absolutely worth it.
Two of my stories were in the highlights.
So there was one shady piece of gossip about Rani Mukherjee, which has been edited(read: murdered) and a Fashion feature.
Well my first fashion feature as 'Fashion Police'.
The content of the article is not too different from my Blog(Purple-Peeptoes), but it feels awesome to be able to talk to a larger audience now.
And the good news is that, it's going to be a weekly column from now on!
Yes, I feel awesome!
Awesome about how everything is falling into place.
I've completed a month at this office and see things get brighter everyday.
I've gotten to know a lot of people who are willing to get me in touch with big designers and stylists.
So my summer internship seems like something I'm going to look forward to.
First it seemed like a far fetched dream (read: lack of experience and no money to get a portfolio done).
In circumstances like these, I chanced upon a model and photographer in dire need of resources.
And now we've formed a team that's going to help all of us.
The the mere thought of it is so exhilarating.
The backache and the clutter seems like a an insignificant price to pay.
It is an awesome Sunday morning.
And from where I'm standing, it seems like and endless row of beautiful mornings.

P.S. For those of you who want to read the article, here's the link

P.P.S. Thanks so much for all the photography ideas. I'll upload the pictures I took soon.

Photography Project.

2010-01-20T22:11:00.000+05:30

Hello Cookie Crumbles.
You know since I have started this Blog, the only thing I have been doing is giving and giving more, be it in terms of knowledge, advice, gyaan, entertainment, moral support. I have been an extremely selfless person and put my followers before myself everytime. How about you repay me for all my kindness by closing that Facebook window and giving me ideas for my photography project.
Let me explain. My topic is 'despair' and no I cannot take pictures of people who look sad, depressed and traumatised. Thank you for being so cretaive. The point is to think out of the box and come up with something more abstract. I have a list of ideas. Go through them and give me suggestions of your own. And please try not to be too technical. Technology and I are not exactly the best of friends, you know?

A goat being slaughtered.
A woman staring at an empty craddle.
A hungry cat.
A man behind bars.
A suicide letter.
Broken green bangles (signifying the woman's lost her husband).
Bare worn out feet with classy high heels in the background.
Ashes.
A coffin.
A man having his shorn off (showing someone in the family has expired).
Newspaper headlines.
A woman. A martiny glass. And a ring. (Not very original but I really empathise with that sort of despair)

That's all I have thought of as of now.
let me know what you guys can think of.
Bisous <3

Stills in High Heels

2010-01-20T20:53:00.003+05:30

Ooooooommmmmgggggggggg today was awesome!
So what if I have made it home with smelly clothes, a mind that is too tired to function, eyes that for once are overwhelmed with the display of colours, legs that are silently abusing me for the torture they have been subjected to and a stomach that has survived up till now on just ONE paratha? *faints*

Today I got a glimpse of how I want the rest of my life to be.

Well, you do know that Blitzkrieg is coming up and I haven't exactly been giving up my goodnight sleep over it or putting everything else on hold just so I can be a part of the process. Of course, there is my Magazine Committee, but we're a really lazy lot.

Now that the photography event has come along, I suddenly find myself more enthused about Blitz than I ever was!

7 models, 7 photographers, an in-studio shoot, a ramp show, haute couture, a make up artist, a hair stylist and a look designer.
Do you want to guess what role I am going to play in this little reality show of our own?
Well no points for guessing right answer.

So let me tell you how we went about it. The first thing we did was making them sit and giving them a big talk. Shivam used fancy words like haute couture, and quotes which nobody understood, while dropping in names of famous photographers every now and then to make the audience go wow. then we took them to the boutique so they could pick their outfits. One for the photoshoot and one for the ramp.

So what I had to do was, have a little talk with each of the models ask them the sort of look they wanted, explain the look I thought would suit them, and then watch the Bridezillas in the making completely ransack the boutique to an extent that it resembled a godown filled with way too many people for it's own good.

But it was so much fun I tell you! Just looking at the stuff there was therapeutic. I loved the whole process of putting their outfit together, picking out their accessories, and advising them on the sort of shoes they should wear. I love how they'd look at me all wide-eyed and mouth open, like I was giving them the most life-changing advice. I loved how there were piles of clothes EVERYWHERE. I loved how the clueless guys picked up the most atrocious outfits and hated me for telling them so. I loved how we took six whole hours to pick just two outfits for each model. But nothing, absolutely nothing beats the happy faces of the models when they left the boutique feeling absolutely special.

So I'm going to say this one more time.
Today was the sax.
Tomorrow is going to be even better!

The Secret.

2010-01-17T21:54:00.003+05:30

I have heard so much about this book, but I could never get myself to buy a copy. It talks about the Law of Attraction, a secret I learned when I was 16. I used to use it a lot then. I managed to make a lot of things happen. But I also miserably failed while attempting the others. I lost Faith. And somewhere along the line, The law of Attraction was forgotten.

The other day I left home without a book. It was going to be a long day and I didn't think I'd survive without one. Just then I literally walked into a Book Stall on the street. Just when I gave up looking, The Secret caught my eye. I started to recollect the random conversations I have had regarding this book, with a lot people. Although I am familiar with the Law, I found myself curious, hopeful and in dire need to make some serious amends. I picked up a copy of the most life changing book I have read so far.

Well, I have been a changed person in the recent past. More accepting of myself, more in control of my emotions and happier than ever before. Yet, there were times I felt I needed to change some areas of my life, but I didn't have the power to make those amends. Do you see how the Universe works? The answer literally found me.

I am sure you are already familiar with the wishful thinking bit, so I thought I'd share the biggest stumbling block to happiness. For one we are as likely to attract the negative emotions, as we are to attract positive. So while I managed to attract the good things, I also attracted a lot of pain and distress, simply because I believed that pain and distress were the consequences of a particular action. I wallowed in pity, because I believed it would hurt. I had terrible experiences, because I believed the negativity would affect. There were times when I felt I wasn't adequate enough. But the you know what? I was. And if I had believed so myself, others would have too.

There were also things I things that I really wished would happen, or messed up things, I wished would work themselves out. But I was always so negative about it. I didn't believe it was in my hands and I blamed it on anything and everything I possibly could. Destiny, Karma, Past Life. You name it.

So I have firmly decided, that I'm not going to let anybody or anything, least of all my own delusional mind, decide the course of my Life. I'm going to buy myself a Golden Book and write down each and every chapter I want to see. Because it IS in my hands.

The Bubble of Happiness

2010-01-06T23:45:00.001+05:30

When something really awesome happens, something else not so happens to break the Bubble of Happiness and give you a reality check basically. I have the liberty to come up with my own article ideas at work and upload them on the website. For an intern to be allowed to do that on her first day at work...very, very wow, no?

And just when I thought it's going to be all happy and smooth sailing with me endlessly ranting about celebs and gossip and fashion and everything that is of no importance to everyone, the happiness bubble is burst.

Apparently, my job doesn't end there. I have to learn to upload it on the site as well. Now you're smirking and telling yourself 'That's not such a big deal. We upload blog posts everyday'. Except, it isn't that simple. There's some software to be learned. And it's very complicated. You think they'd make a technically challenged girl who can't even use Microsoft Word properly do all of this?! The big bad world I tell you!

But then theory #2 (which I made up this very instant) says that right after the spoiler, there's an awesome un-spoiler. So I'm sitting slumped looking at my computer screen wondering, omg how am I ever going to learn this, I spot his itam (read:eye candy) in the periphery of my vision. Slowly and steadily the corner of my lips curl. Eye candy in the office. Woohoo!

Two minutes later Itam walks towards our side of the office. Four minutes later boss introduces us and magic happens. Through his black rimmed glasses and my grey rimmed glasses, our eyes meet and then everything stops for a moment, music plays in the background, and my stole flies a little before he smiles and suddenly says hi.

Then happiness bubble which was soaring way, way beyond the ceiling of the office goes pop. Apparently, he didn't belong to this office. Didn't belong to any office, I think. He had come there with some shady looking film-maker friend of his to show us a film they had made.

First, I see the glasses. Second, I see this very, very saxy (not sexy, sAxy) beard. Third, I see nice grey shirt, then I come to know he's filamwala. What can I say, I was very, very impressed. So impressed that I was on the verge of grinning to myself like an idiot. Happiness bubble started to soar again. Make hay while the sun shines, right? :D

And then we watched the movie. We, as in not the two of us, the entire office and then more brownie points were mentally given to Itam. After that everyone sat and discussed the movie. Well I didn't have much to say except for may be 'wow' so I just shut up and listened. Not too much conversation happened. But it so happens that Itam will be coming soon again. And that is the happy ending to my story.

P.S. Happiness bubble is still soaring :D

P.P.S. Of course a lot of description is HIGHLY exaggerated.

P.P.P.S. Itam if you accidentally landed up on my blog and read this, don't hold it against me. Just don't!

Fashion Suicidal (Part 2)

2010-01-05T14:42:00.000+05:30

1. Crocs. The only sort of footwear that is actually uglier than a pair of floaters. Just give me a good reason why absolutely anybody would want to make their feet look ugly and gigantic. It's a conspiracy I tell you. I bet people with unusually large feet came up with crocs. And it's bad enough that they were available everywhere, now they have opened up entire shops for the sole purpose of selling them!

2. Asymmetrical skirts. It's 2010 my friend. Looks like your calendar is still stuck on 2004.

3. Tie Up Heels. Yes they were the coolest things ever and that was FIVE years ago, so pleaaassseeeee stop wearing or will cry and scream!

4. Fish-tail skirts. Done to death my friend. Done to Death.

5. Tees with lame slogans.I'm not against slogan tees, but Good Lord I see such lame ones. It makes me wonder where this World is going. The other day someone was wearing a tee that said 'I'm on a see food diet. Whenever I see food I eat it!'. What about- 'If you want Breakfast in bed, sleep in the Kitchen.' Uhh reaallyy? The worst of the lot has to be FBI- female body investigator. The next time I see one of those I'm going to wear a tee that says - MBC: Male Body Castrator.

Fashion Suicidal (Part One)

2010-01-04T21:15:00.000+05:30

• Cream and Grey. You know when I look at colours like these, I am thinking why do they even call them colours?! They look like pieces of cloth that have been either worn more than a zillion times or passed on from generation to generation until they lost every bit of colour. And to think that some fashionably advanced people would pair the two of them together! The ultimate fashion disaster I tell you!

• Pink and Pink. Trying to play Reese Witherspoon from Legally Blonde. Sorry honey, you’re really not cute enough to pull it off. Your life is not a movie either. And the chances of it ever being a movie are close to nil. So may be if you’re thinking pretending to be glamourous might help and I‘m so sorry dear, even that is never going to happen.

• Floaters and Socks. If you're feeling cold, please wear a pair of sneakers okay? Floaters are not the new sneakers. And if you think your feet are that ugly, then just get a friggin pedicure done!

• Floaters and Anklets. You know it's bad enough that you're wearing floaters and well let's face it, they're terribly ugly. And then you think you're being oh-so-glamorous by wearing anklets with them. To think that you'd insult something as pretty as an anklet my teaming it up with a Floater! There is no respect for pretty little things in this World!

• Printed pants and printed tees. Have you seen those god-awful jeans with stuff written all over them and like a million gazillion pockets? I can't stand the sight of them. But you know what is worse than wearing them, wearing them with a shirt that is filled with those hideous patterns. It's amazing how they manage to ruin a perfectly nice plain shirt with all that 'creativity'.

• Low Waisted Jeans. Low waisted jeans aren't the problem. The butt crack I am forced to see however is.
• Sweat pants with stuff written across the rear-end. You know I see these sweat pants with Delicious and Bootylicious written on them. But the stuff inside hardly ever fits the description.

• Leggings and short tops. Leggings are called leggings because they’re supposed to show the shape of your legs off. Do we want to see anything above that? I think not. Especially because most of the time it is pretty much shapeless.

Sometimes I wish...

2010-01-03T16:44:00.003+05:30

Sometimes I wish people still attended Balls.
Sometimes I wish the World would break into Song and Dance.
Sometimes I wish I could travel anywhere in the World I really wanted to.
Sometimes I wish I could sit alone by the sea and make conversations with random people.
Sometimes I wish I could bring a smile on every sad face.
Sometimes I wish I could fight every cause I believed in.
Sometimes I wish I could go back in time and see how it feels.
Sometimes I wish I could fast forward life, and take a sneak peak.
Sometimes I wish there was a pause button as well.
Sometimes I wish the good days would never end.
Sometimes I wish I could be with all the people who mattered the most.
Sometimes I wish I'd lived in a better World.
Sometimes I wish I could just write all day.
Sometimes I wish I could just bury myself in books.
Sometimes I wish things came without a price tag.
Sometimes I wish people would appreciate the little things that make their lives worthwhile.
Sometimes I wish people would care about others a little more.
Sometimes I wish people would realise their own worth.
Sometimes I wish people gave out a little less Hatred and a little more Love.
Sometimes I wish......

I have been Tagged :)

2009-12-31T17:49:00.001+05:30

1. What is your current obsession?

Coloured net stockings, Tiny shorts(Lets wear them while the legs are waxed), Starry prints, Long silver chains, Dhoti Pants, whacko earrings and Black tea.

2. What are you wearing today?

Dark Blue Skinny jeans, Black Spagetti with Blue Print and golden polka dots, Rusted hoops and Purple and Golden Chappals.

3. What’s for dinner/lunch?

Kulcha :D

4. What’s the last thing you bought?

Long grey Racer back so I can wear it with coloured leggings.

5. What are you listening to right now?

Hole Hole se hava chalti Hai :( Boo Hoo People in my office have terrible taste in music.

6. What do you think about the person who tagged you?

I think she's awesome and we'll totally get along if we ever meet.

7. If you could have a house totally paid for, fully furnished anywhere in the world, where would you like it to be?

London? Paris? New York? *sigh* I don't know. May be after I travel half the World I'll be able to tell you.

8. What are your must-have pieces for summer?

Sundresses, Cotton skirts, Tiny Colourful Shorts and floral FlipFlops :)

9. If you could go anywhere in the world for the next hour, where would you go?

Paris here I come, baby!

10. Which language do you want to learn?

Spanish, Urdu and Sindhi(more than what I already know)

11. What’s your favourite quote?

I dunno :s Eat today, diet tomorrow?

12. Who do you want to meet right now?

Rajaaaaaaat Kapooooor

13. What is your favourite colour?

Pink. But I have been cheating on it with purple and green lately.

14. Give us 3 styling tips that work for you.

Sit below the fan for nice bouncy hai (when they are wet that is :P)
Use liquid liner. Kajal smudges and makes me look like a ghost.
Always have a pair of plain black tees. they go with all the funky coloured bottoms.

15. What is your dream job?

Well for one I want to write(like you didn't know that already :P) but I also want to be a staaaalasssssssst. Stylist I mean. Imagine making money out of dressing people. Kya Baat hai. Wah Wah :P

16. What’s your favorite magazine?

Vogue :D

17. If you had $100 now, what would you spend it on?

You wanna answer that for me? :D

18. What do you consider a fashion faux pas?

Cream + Grey!! Aaaaa I ahte that colour combination.
And don't get me started on this. Let's reserve this for my next blog post.

19. Who according to you is the most over-rated style icon?

Celebs in general i think. they hardly have the creativity to put an outfit together. If it weren't for the stylists and the designers they really wouldn't be lookign this gorgeous.

20. What kind of haircut do you prefer?

Long and bouncy with pretty curls at the bottom.

21. What are you going to do after this?

Go to Candies :)

22. What are your favourite movies?

Uhh I have already put that on my profile incase you haven't noticed.

23. What inspires you?

Creative people. Artistic people. People who believe they can do whatever they and go out there and achieve it.

24. What do your friends call you most commonly?

Well ofcourse there's Karishma and then there is Kim(which I like very much). But the atroious one- Fatty, Kimbo, Kimball (yes Ball), BlondiePoo, and Raja (short for Rajani...losers!)

25. Would you prefer coffee or tea?

Well Coffee is the eternal love of my life. Tea and I are just having a fling.

26. What do you do when you are feeling low or terribly depressed?

I rely a lot on chocolate or else I just call up some nice people and make them cheer me up.

27. What makes you go wild?

Wild liek angry wild? Stoopid people! really they make me wonder what is going to happen to this world.

28. Which other blogs do you love visiting?

We have Blog Rolls for a reason dumass.

29. Favorite Dessert/Sweet?

choocolateeeeeee. Khoyaaaaa (Awesomest Sindhi sweet). Jalebi and Rabdi. Jhama's Gulab Jamun. And lastly boys in black shirts :)

30. How many tabs are turned on in ur browser right now?

Twitter and some work related stuff that I am shamelessly ignoring.

31. Favorite Season?

Winterrr :)

32. If I come to your house now, what would u cook for me?

Corn and capsicum in white sauce, Mind you it's very, very yummy :)

33. What is the right way to avoid people who purposefully hurt you?

Don't give them a chance to. It's only when you think they matter that they start to affect you. Only let the right people matter. Let the others feed on their dung.

34. What are you afraid of the most?

Kuutteeeeee!

35. When you looked at yourself in the mirror today, what was the first thing you thought?

How can you be this gorgeous? :P

36. What brings a smile on your face instantly?

Good food, Good people, Free stuff, Pretty things and Sales :)

37. A word that you say a lot?

Omg!

P.S. Thank You Shrey for taggign me :)

P.P.S. here's my list of people who are tagged:

Esha, Rshi, Malpani, Parinita, Henna, Zeba, Himani, Disguise, Sulagna, And whoever else wishes to be tagged.

It's time for Resolutions baby :)

2009-12-31T15:44:00.001+05:30

Who cares if I don't keep them (which I very much intend to btw) it gives me a reason to rant, so rant I will :)

Be a more positive person and spread the positivity to the less fortunate. When I say less fortunate I mean - Omg! He doesn't love me anymore, My parents never give me enough money, All the problems in the World keep piling up on me, ityadi, ityadi.
Be less bitchy. Not that I'm bitchy or anything (snicker and you will die) but I want to be nicer to people, including those I hate and those who dress like absolute losers(yes it is a very important standard by which I judge people. deal with it!)
Kiss good-bye to gluttony. *Sigh*
Kiss good-bye to Shopaholicism. yes I really did say that and no I am not possesed.
Kiss goodbye to lazyness. Like may be a little later.
Be more healthy. Go for walks, eat ghaspoos, dry fruits, drink green tea, ityadi, ityadi...
Find a sexy boi.
Learn to wake up early.
Get awesome marks.
Look for awesome internships.
Basically do a lot of useful things in life so I can tell my kids- hamere time mein toh main sabse phast(first :P) aaya karti thi. Not that I intend to talk to them like that or anything, but it just gives that mamma-ish feel. Know what I mean? :P
Apply to some really awesome Unis by the end of this year and say goodbye to Matrubhumi. But don't worry Mumbai, I love you very much and I'll be back someday for good.
Read a lot of good books. Know more, crow more.
Religiously read newspapers, not one in five days. Be an awesome Journo student.
Learn more Belly Dance.
Be very spiritual. meditate for atleast 20 minutes everyday.
Learn how to read the Osho tarot deck (ThankU E!).
Be more artistic.
Grow hair and be Rupanzel-like for 2011.
Lastly, learn to return library books on time. *Sigh*

So this is it for now.
I think 2010 will be fab.
And at the end of it I'll be okay.
Fab actually.
Happy New Year Losers!
XoXo (yea too much of Gossip Girl these days)

Because I like it here.

2009-12-29T20:56:00.005+05:30

You know how you expect your typical first day at work to be, right?

You go home late wondering why you came here in the first place...

If all female bosses intentionally model themselves on Meryl Steep from 'The Devil wears Prada'...

And if work is all about being overworked and underpaid.

But it sort of helps if you're prepared for the worst.

It kind of turns your average first day to a not-so-average first day.

Infact, I left the office feeling -Wow! That wasn't bad at all.

For a while, all I have been doing is, going to college, pretending to take down notes, delaying all my projects, wasting way too much time on the phone, letting Facebook take over my life and hanging out with friends a little more than I should.

And that feeling of guilt....

Well. it had been lingering for a while now.

And then Indiatimes came along.

Ya, I know... not the most exciting place to work, but for beginners, believe me it's fab.

If you get to do something other than serving coffee and xeroxing papers, consider yourself very lucky.

And I am getting to do more than that.

I get to upload articles and actually be a part of my process.

Isn't it wonderful, the feeling that your opinion is actually counted?

Besides, the people also seem very nice.

Who wants to work in an office full of bitchy, condescending people right?

The loos are clean and the coffee is aaamaaazing!

Plus, one of my friends is working in the Zoom office, which is right opposite my office.

So I have nothing to complain about! :)

Ok, not nothing.

I do hate the fact that there are waaaay too many dogs in the compound.

Ah well! That I'm going to have to deal with.

That's all for now Cupcakes!

Merry X'ams and Happy New year!

Secret Santa :)

2009-12-20T23:16:00.003+05:30

My friends and I have decided to play this game called Secret Santa this year.
Wondering what this Secret santa is all about?
Let me explain.

You make a chit for each person.
Then everybody picks a chit and automatically becomes a Secret Santa for that person.
And what does Santa do?
Well he picks a present for his little child and then waits until Christmas to give it to him/her.
Sounds exciting?
Well it is!!
I cannot wait to find out who my Secret Santa is !!
I absolutely cannot wait to receive my gift!!
I absolutely, absolutely cannot wait for the 24th!!

Anyway, I've decided to make life easier for Secret Santa and make a list of all the things I want :)
Mind you, Santa this is one LONG list!

Well I am having a verrrryyyy Boho phase right now and I'm fascinated by ALL things Indian and Tribal. So Harem pants, Patialas, Paisley printed pants, Parallels, Chunky jewellery, Jhumkaas, Kadas, Jholas, Kurtas, Belly Chains, Indian chappals, Bindis and anything else you can think of :)
Cat-eye Sunglasses (Azaad Bazaar!)
Gangis! All the possible colours!
Net stockings! Oraaaannnggggeeeeeeeeee!
Net socks. Reeeeeeedddddddd! :D
Darrrkkkkk Chocolate! Bars and bars of them!
Black/Grey cardigan.
Indian-ish Diary.
Ballerinaaaaaaaaaaas! :D
Red or Grey leggings.
A long tee to wear with the leggings.
Body Mist.
Peacock Blue/ Purple eye pencil.
Any book that you think I might like. I'm really not fussy.
Anything Pink/Purple/Glittery or absolutely colourful :)

So that's about it Santa. For now.
Do come in tomorrow for the Second List :P

Statutory Warning : Buy me a shady gift and die!

New Beginnings.

2009-12-18T23:17:00.003+05:30

Remember October Rains? The brand I was going to start. Well my samples are ready, but god knows why I haven't been feeling motivated enough to started marketing it as yet. It's very easy to come up with ideas, buy the cloth and get a tailor to make it for you. But the setting up a business, working on the website, marketing your product, not so easy. Especially, if you barely have anybody helping you.

Just dealing with the creative aspect and letting somebody else sell your product seems so much easier. Infact, I had been thinking about taking my samples to various boutiques and asking them if they were interested in selling my designs. I guess I didn't believe in myself enough to go out there and convince people to do that.

Today I went to Azaad Bazaar for the third time.After a while, the lady at the store casually asked us what sort of things would we like to see at the store. I really like how they want to take that extra effort to make sure all of us find exactly the things we're looking for. So I started telling her the sort of bags I wanted to see, which somehow lead to me giving her a few ideas on what she could possibly do. She seemed to like them and told me it would be so much better if I just execute them myself. She'll be happy to display them in her store with a small percentage for herself, of course. My Reaction? A grin that spread so wide, it almost couldn't spread anymore (*rolls her eyes*).

I love their store so much. It's not like there's much for me to buy, they're really nice people, so you always feel welcome. Plus, they always give us free stuff. Me and freebies, we go a looong way. The first time we went there, they gave us awesome kaju-katri, second time we got 5-stars AND key chains and today I had my first cup of black tea(which I totally loved btw). And now they're willing to sell my stuff if they really like it! I absofuckinglutely love them!

P.S. I'm going to mail some of the stuff now and show them the rest tomorrow. Wish me luck! :)

P.P.S. Here's a picture of the store and some of the stuff they're selling.

What to wear this week.

2009-12-16T02:33:00.002+05:30

Elloes my Pumpkin Pies!
It's 2 a.m. in the morning and for some God forsaken reason, sleep seems to have abandoned me. So here I am sitting online, looking for people I can entertain with my random nonsensical rants(mind you, the later you speak to me, the more amusing you will find me), but they too seem to have deserted me. So it's just me and my Cinnamom Sunshine tonight. And since I have nothing of any use to tell you about, I'm going to make a list or lists may be, depending on how bored I am.
List no 1 - What to wear this week.
firstly I'm a very lazy person. I wake up at 10 a.m. for a 10.30 a.m. lecture and manage to move out by 10.45. Shame on me! And in my hurry to eat and bathe and eat some more I barely get a chance to spend time on dressing up (Haha. I can almost hear people who know me too well say - What a friggin Liar!). The point is, I almost feel like I'm in some sort of drunken stupor because my brain refuses to function. Plus, if you've looked at my closet, you'd think it was hit by a tornado. Imagine looking for you favourite pink boat neck tee in that mess. Sounds like a real adventure, no? But if you're already running so late, that you doubt you'll make it for the lecture even after half of it is over, not so much of an adventure ladies (the reason I say ladies is because the gentlemen probably closed this tab a loooooong time ago)! So I have decided to become a more organised person starting today! I'm going to make a list of things I intend to wear this week. That way I wont have to wrack my brains in the morning, plus I can look through that tornado-stricken mess at night itself and find whatever I need for the next day one, in advance (Yeaaa right.).

1. Dark Blue capris + Parrot Green tee + Purple bandhini Dupatta (as a stoal) + Journalist bag + Silver anklets + Colourful Mojris

2. Faded jeans + Scottish Pinafore with Black Puff sleeved tee + denim Converse + Navy Blue/ Black bag + Silver Hoops

3. Brown Pleated Skirt + White Puff Sleeved blouse + Golden Princess Locket + Cream Sequined Purse + Golden Ballerinas

4. Black leggings + Green mini skirt + White tee with black face print + Black and Golden Ballerinas

5. Denim capris + Black vest + Pink polka Dotted Hoodie + Denim Converse + Pink star earrings

6. Navy blue dress + Black cardigan + Pink satin tie ups + Pink Star earrings

7. Black leggings + Long white top with silver embossing + Black cardigan + Black satin flip flops with diamond studs + Silver Hoops + Diamond butterfly pendant

That's all for this week :)
Lots and lots of love <3

Because you are not him.

2009-12-12T22:26:00.002+05:30

(The picture is for representational purposes only)

She looked at him and then looked away.
She didn't have the right answer to his question.
"Why do you keep pushing me away?"
That's the only answer he'd ever asked for.
That's the only answer she could never give him.

Everytime a boy made his move, she'd find herself feeling extremely queasy.
She felt the urge to push him away befor he made his way into the forbidden territory.
He doesn't belong here.
That's what she'd tell herself.

She wasn't afraid of letting people in.
And it wasn't love she was afraid of.
It's just that she still loved him too much.
It's funny how time and space changed none of that.

And that boy sitting in front of her...
He was perfect.
He really was.
But there was just one problem.

He was not him.
He was just not him.

Things to do - 2

2009-12-11T22:00:00.002+05:30

Visit an Astrologer/ Palmist/ Tarot card reader. Sounds a liitle insane. But I'm soooo fascinated by the paranormal. I love giving readings. But what I love even more is getting readings! Plus, I'm such a curious person. A little too eager to know what's going to happen before it actually does. I want to get a rough idea of what 2010 is going to be like for me. That way I can try to prevent the negatives and focus all my energy on the positives.
Launch October Rains! Remember the brand I was going to start. I have the samples and all ready. Ever since I've come back from the IV, I haven't looked into it at all. I have to get the photo shoot done, so I can start marketing asap!
IFinish decorating my new room! Buy the curtains and the fancy wall paintings! pronto!
Clean my room. It's a been months.
Work on the Blitzkrieg magazine. Make it so awesome, that people who despise magazines fall in love with it.

That's all I can think of as of now.
More later <3

It's not over yet.

2009-12-11T01:12:00.003+05:30

A few days back I wrote a blog post about all the things I have managed to achieve this year. But what I am forgetting is, the year is not over yet. So while I'm all geared up for 2010 there are things I still need to achieve before 2009 ends. So here's the list:

Lose weight! I've eaten like a pig during the IV. Consequences- potatoness! Game Plan: Stay away from the dark brown pieces of heaven and learn to rise before 10 am, so I can go for a walk.
Grow my hair. Well yes I know hair grows on it's own, but this is to remind myself to nourish my hair with almond oil and eat the right kind of food.
Stop living in Rewind or Fast Forward mode. I feel like I've been holding on to the past and it's perfect moments for too long now. And when I'm not doing that I keep thinking about how perfect my future is going to be. In the bargain I forget to live in the Present. And the truth is, the Present is what matters the most.
Do my projects really well. I want awesome marks this Semester!
Read a couple of good books.
Update my Blog regularly! Very, Very realisable goal. :)

Well that's all for now. Good bye and Bisous <3

I want another TweetUp !

2009-12-08T23:06:00.001+05:30

I don't think I've mentioned this before, but I love Twitter.
Sounds ironical considering I barely use it.
But if it weren't for twitter I wouldn't know Himani, Zeba, Henna and Nihit.
So I just wanted to say this.
I love you guys and I love Twitter.
And since I didn't get a chance to see you guys this Sunday I miss you very much.
So here's a post about what I miss the most. =(

I miss Himani's hilarious descriptions*read: shapeless boobs) and how she frowns upon the intellectually challenged :D

I miss Henna's happy face just before she's about to tell us something exciting.

I miss Nihit watching finish off sugar, ketchup and all the unrequited stuff that's on the table.
But what I miss more is watching him grumble about EVERYTHING under the sun.

I miss watching Zeba's disgusted face everytime he does that or cracks a perverted joke. I can almost hear her saying- 'How can people be like this? How? '

I don't really miss Esha (I see her pretty face everyday :D).

So let's meet up before the end of this week, ok?

Blitzkrieg, COWS and the Magazine Committee.

2009-12-07T14:58:00.002+05:30

For those of you who don't know what Blitzkrieg is, slap yourself 200 times before going further into this post.
Now let me explain. It's a college festival.
Actually calling it 'A' college festival is demeaning it to some extent.
So I'm going to put it this way-
It is 'The' College Festival.
Plus it is a BMM fest.
So brownie points for that.

For some other people it is the highlight of their academic year.
They start making decisions about it a year in advance and basically have nothing else to discuss until Blitz comes around, after which the sole focus of their life is to start preparing for the next Blitzkrieg.
I appreciate such people. I really do.
If it weren't for them we wouldn't have a fest at all.
I am however pleased to inform all of you that I have a life and Blitzkrieg is only occupying 1/50 of my mind space right now.
That in no way means I'm not going to work for Blitz.
I am, and whole heartedly because it sounds like way too much fun.

The only thing that was stopping was the fact that I was in a committee that was totally not working for me.
It's called the COWS committee by the way.
Before you start snickering let me tell you what the full form is.
Closing, Opening, Workshops and Seminars.
Doesn't sound so bad eh?
Well it isn't.
I worked for it last year and had quite a good time.
But this year I kept feeling so unmotivated.
At the same time I couldn't really find another committee that really works for me.

And then the Magazine Committee came along.
Could I ask for something better?
Could I?
It's so much fun to let others do all the difficult work while you just watch them, smirk and write about all of it.
It makes Blitzkrieg so much more exciting.
So from now on I stalk meetings, get updates from everyone, get the inside gossip, write funny articles, my opinion on the different events (like I'm some important journalist and my opinion really matters), have my own Fashion Page, stalk hot guys from other colleges, put all of it in a magazine that I have put my sweat and blood into, plus hold meetings and boss over my juniors.

So all I have to say is Blitzkrieg 2010 here I come :D

2009 and Me.

2009-12-06T18:48:00.002+05:30

Since I'm feeling extremely positive this time round, I'm going to introspect a little and talk about all the things I have achieved this year. So, achieved is pushing it a bit. Let's talk about all the things that have made me proud of me.

First and foremost, I got my first paycheque. I know working for Campus Junkie doesn't really count as working, but I loved every bit of it. The best part was blowing my own cash. Hell I shopped a lot. I went about it in a very oraganised manner (Note to myself : Learn to be organised in things other than shopping as well).I made a fancy list of all the things I want to buy. And I mamanged to buy a lot of stuff from my list. :D

I finally started teaching. I was so apprehensive in the beginning. I knew I can dance and teach well. But the prospect of addressing so many people at one time was overwhelming. I thought that my students would never like me enough to come back. Well guess what? They do. And they say pretty good stuff about me. And at this point I don't even care if I have to handle 50 students. I'm pretty sure I can do it . :)

Plus, I like how I've gotten in touch with the dancer in me. I almost can't imagine myself not dancing now. Writing is still the first love of my life. But everytime I tie that coin belt around my waist and let the music reign over my soul, it gives me a magical feeling.

Well I write more than ever before. There was a phase where I had almost stopped writing because I was too caught up in other things. I can't even relate to that phase anymore. I also wrote my first short story this year. So yay me :P

Plus, I update my blog regularly. I do have someone to thank for that (Thank you E-shade for inspiring me to start one and then updating yours regularly so I feel pretty loserish about not updating mine).

As for my Fashion Blog, not to be too dramatic or anything, but I feel like it gives meaning to my life. Some people take pictures of animals, some people take pictures of new places. The reason they do that is because they're fascinated by the subject. Well what should a girl do if fashion fascinates her more than anything? Well take pictures of the magic that pieces of clothing can create and share it with the World.

Well, I'm also really happy that this year I finally discovered how much Fashion means to me. I've always been a little crazy that way, but now I feel like it's the art form I believe in. It's such an integral part of me that I can't do away with it. So whatever I choose to do later in life, the element of fashion has to be there.

Well, I made peace with my spiritual side. Until I was 16, Religion and Spirituality had almost no meaning in my life. And when I felt the inclination towards them, a lot of things started to go upside down. I realised I had more questions than answers, and it started to affect me majorly. But as I mentioned earlier, I have understood myself further and made peace with that side of me.

I discovered I can heal people. It's a beautiful feeling you know, when you manage to ease the pain and bring a smile on someone's face. It leaves them feeling extremely positive. And believe me, that positivity is contagious.

I finally managed to heal, if you know what I mean, found the self-esteem I think I never really had and generally imbibed a very positive towards life in general.

I also lost weight :) But then again I found it in the IV.

I managed to grow my hair, but mad-O-Wot ruined it for me (Stupid salon will rot in hell).

Oh and I finally wore my pink net stockings :D (judge me and DIE)

Rajasthan <3

2009-12-02T23:42:00.000+05:30

So I'm back :)

2009-12-02T09:22:00.003+05:30

Bumpy bus rides.
Quarreling for the window seat.
Eventful train journeys.
Gossip sessions in the room.
Endless discussions at dinner time.
Visits to the most palatial buildings in the country.
Food that tasted like it was heaven sent.
Sand dunes that looked like they been taken right out of a movie.
Going gaga over the oxidized jewelery in the market.
Cursing camels that make you feel like you're going to fall off and tumble into the sand.
Actually tumbling into the sand.
Hotel rooms that made me feel like a princess.
Walks around the hotel in the cold, breezy night.
Making new friends.
Bonding with the old.
Eavesdropping on conversations.
Dressing up in colourful garments.
Clicking a million pictures.
Taking back a million memories.

I still don't know when the IV started and when it ended.
It pretty much seemed like an extra long day.
The kind that leaves you feeling happy for days after that.
Though I thoroughly enjoyed every bit of my trip, let me tell you what I like the most.
I liked how absolutely colourful Rajasthan is.
Shopping was such an adventure.
Whenever I go to a new place, I want to explore the local market and pick up some really interesting things to take back with me.
So I bought this really awesome pair of bandhini printed Dhoti Pants, a Dupatta and a spagetti top.
As for jewellery I went a little crazy.
I got one of those kadas you wear on your arm, thick anklets and thick bangles.
I got a nice pair of mojris and a jhola I am absolutely obsessed with right now.
I'll put up the pictures shortly.

Well apart from that, I really like dhow I talked to a lot of people.
I used be like that in Junior College.
Always out there and socialising.
Don't know what happened to me after I left that place.
Well it feels really good to know a lot of people again. :)

My Grandparents are the best :)

2009-11-21T22:46:00.002+05:30

I leave for my IV(Industrial Visit) this weekend. I completely forgot to tell my grandfather about it though. He's a very outdoorsy person but he obviously can't travel much. So when he gets to hear that any of us are traveling, he gets pretty excited. He also insists on giving us money, though mum and dad do that anyway.

So the two of us are sitting in his room discussing the trip when my Grandmum walks in. he asks her to go fetch his wallet. When she does, he removes the money and hands it over to me.

(The entire conversation is in Sindhi)

Granddad: Pesa ghat thee vaya ta makhe phone kajey, dad khe na.
                (If you run out of cash call me. Don't call your dad)

Me: Chinta na kayo. (Dont worry about it.)

Granddad: Ghat thee venda ta ma tojhe tadi jo tade e-mail kare chandindam.
               (If the need be, I'll 'e-mail you the money that minute itself.)

Grandmum: (Laughing hysterically): Paisa e-mail kanda? E-mail mein ta nyapo vendo aa!
                      (You're planning to e-mail money? Don't you know, you can only send messages through
                      e-mails.)

Granddad: (Looks like he is in a fix.)

Grandmum: (After thinking for a very long time) Money order patheta sago.
                     (We can send her a money order.)

Grandad: Ho suthi idea aye. (That is a good idea.)

Grandmum: (As if hit by sudden realisation) Par money order pathe natha sago choki jestai peso vendo, ho huto hali vendi.
    (Money order is not a good idea. By the time you send her the money, she will have left the place.)

Grandad: Hane? (Now?)

Grandmum: Heeya kayo. Hunke khe hane hi double de chadyo. Problem theendo hi na.
      (Just give her double of what you just did. Problem solved!)

Then she just smiles feeling pretty smug about her superior intelligence and the fact that she knows the difference between an e-mail and a money order. My granddad in the meanwhile forces me to accept more money and won't take no for an answer.

Grandmum, Granddad, you guys are the sweetest :)
I can't I wont see them for an entire week. =(

I'm healing.

2009-11-18T17:17:00.003+05:30

There are times you feel like you've never cried this much before.
Like no one could have possible come close to seeing this much pain.
And that the wounds inflicted upon your heart are so deep that no medicine in the world could possible heal them.

Well, guess what? You're wrong.
May be the marks will stay forever.
But the pain eventually fades and recedes into a deep, dark corner of your conciousness, never to bother you again until you want it to.
That's right.
It is in your hands.
You can hold on to it forever and mope about it.
Or you can choose to look at life with a different perspective.

My new perspective says, I don't regret anything that happened.
Every experience makes you stronger.
When you find yourself caught in the middle of the Hailstorm, you gain more than you can imagine.
You learn to be immune and you learn to be armed.
You learn to fight and survive through every hailstorm that comes your way.

And most importantly it teaches you a lot of things about life.
It taught me that my self-worth is solely in my hands.
No one deserves the right to make my self-esteem suffer.
I don't need to vie for anybody's love or affection.
I don't need anybody's approval to feel worthwhile.
Because I know I am.

Having acquired this new philosophy, I'm proud to say that I'm definitely walking on the Path of Healing.
I wake up everyday to a new me, I love and accept more than ever before.

Things I like the most about College Fests

2009-11-15T21:30:00.003+05:30

Lots and lots of Eye candy. You know how shady the guys in KC are? You know how deprived our eyes are of the good stuff? Don't just sit there in front of your computer screens and nod because you'll never know!

No lectures!Yea that's right! No lectures. They get cancelled so as to encourage full participation.

How everyone tries to look their best and dresses exceptionally well. I love all the fashion statements (and some disasters) I get to see.

Unlimited Gossip. You know how BMM is filled with girls? And how most of the guys act like girls anyway? And you know what happens when people who despise each other have to work together for days? You get the point right?

Catfights! Need I explain why? :)

Well lots of fab events to particpate in.

Lots of Fabulous Prices as well.

And freebies while the events are going on! Oh, how I love getting things I don't have to pay for!\
Such a great way to socialise with other colleges.

Such a great way to watch creatures from other college in a habitat other than their own. Then make fun of them and remind yourself how much better the people from your college actually are. Believe me, everytime I see people from colleges whose names I don't want to mention here, I fall in love with every living creature from KC.

The unlimited oppurtunitity to scream your lungs out. (Read: Cheer!)

Actually win brownie points for that! (Can you believe the PR event depends solely on how much you can cheer for your contingent?)

Act like ghaatis. Ever gone to shady cinemas to watch third grade Bollywood flicks? Seen the way people hoot and scream? Well fests make us behave a little bit like that. So everytime that shady guy from lets call it We-are-the-Losers College would come on stage to strut his stuff ( Mind you the guy was short. round and chose to wear sunglasses inside the audi) , E and I would start screaming things like - Abey Itam and Hot stuff take that shirt off.

And the fact that we're the best Contigent and we ALWAYS win :D Go Chacha Chaudhary!

P.S. Chacha Chaudhary was the name they gave our contigent. So don't you dare judge me for writing that!

Expectations and Lies.

2009-11-12T22:50:00.001+05:30

When it comes to Giving, one should be able to give all that one can without expecting anything in return.
I was under the impression that I was capable of the same.
When I care about people I can go out of the way to make them happy.
It makes me happy to see the smile on their faces.
A while ago I did something for someone I care about deeply, that brought immense joy to him.
It gave me a sort of high.
I felt worthwhile because I was capable of making so much of a difference.

However, when I thought over what I had done the next day, it made me feel a little bit stupid.
Would he have done the same for me?
As if.
Would he do anything at all for me?
Once in a Blue Moon.
Would he atleast be grateful?
For a day. After that he wouldn't even remember.
So I set out to do something that was supposed to make me happy and ended up hurting myself instead.
All I wanted to say was, I want to be able to take and give back as much as I can.
I want to be able to give with my whole heart and hope for nothing in return.

Remanika's new Ad campaign

2009-11-11T15:45:00.000+05:30

Don't you just love it?

Everything that I want from life.

2009-11-11T15:18:00.001+05:30

The Future holds within itself many secrets that the Present will never know. But dreaming about it is just one of those things I can't help. I know that not all of it is in my hands, but that shouldn't stop me from hoping for the best.

From all the things I want from the Future, happiness tops my list. I want to be able to find happiness wherever I am, doing whatever it is that I am doing with my life.

Librans are characteristically people's persons. I want to be surrounded by positive people all the time. I want to be able to keep all the people I love very close to me and end up with the one I love the most.

There are so many things I want to do professionally. I want life to give me a chance to do all of them.

I want to be able to travel to all the places I have ever wanted to, no matter how close or how far they are, see the world for what it is, and may be even live there for a while.

I want to be able to change the world in my own way. Fight for causes that I believe in. Give a voice to the ones who have been suppressed for the longest time.

Well, I as much as I hate to admit it, I can be materialistic a lot of times. I never want to give a second thought to what I buy. I want to be able to own all the things in the world I have ever wanted to.

And I want to have a house of my own. A house that I have designed myself, combining British and Indian styles of Architecture. Contemporary is nice, but it lacks the charm and drama of the old, classic structures, which I want my house to possess.

I'm not sure how may children I want, but I want atleast one daughter and I want her to be just like me.

And I never want to retire, because I bloody love working. So I want to be able to do something I love till the very end and die knowing that I have achieved everything that I ever wanted to, fame, success, money and the title of the most stylish grandmother.

Things I learned in the Recent Past

2009-11-09T15:09:00.002+05:30

Most girls are so insecure. No matter how pretty, intelligent or popular they are, they'll continue to be threatened by other girls.
When it comes attention, they won't want to share it with anyone. Infact they don't even want to be in the same room as a girl who commands more attention than they do.

College drama never ends. Never.

Very few people can really be happy for you. Most people are too busy thinking about themselves or how they deserve your share of happiness and success, more than you do.

There are very few people who do good without expecting anything in return.

Sometimes you chase something only to realise it isn't worth it at all. And then you want to turn back. Your head and heart are in conflict. Your head tells not to give it up. You've fought too hard for it. Your heart tells you that if it doesn't make you happy, it isn't worth it at all. Listen to your heart. At the end of the day it is happiness that matters the most.

Indian Eccentricities

2009-11-05T20:42:00.002+05:30

Things I will never understand about my family and Indian Population in general :

How Ghee is supposedly the ultimate source of energy.
Why the best of way treating a guest is to feed him enough to give him diarrhea.
Sarees and short blouses are graceful, but cropped tops are looked down upon.
How possesion of gold is the best way of determining how successful a person is.
How marriage is supposedly the highlight of an individual's life.
The fact that arranged marriages are source of so much pride.
So is the boy from 'Amreeka'.
Their definition of 'Good Family', 'Khandani Log' and 'Khaata Peeta Ghar'.
Sympathies towards, families with no sons and only daughters. They fucking have every reason to celebrate.
The need to spend life savings on their children's wedding.
Why the most random people have to be invited, just because they're related to you, never mind that you haven't seen them in years! In a lot of cases, never!
Why the Bride's dress is costs more than everybody else's dresses combined. Oh wait, that I actually do understand.
How fairness defines value in the 'marriage market'.
Why it is acceptable for men to have lost their virginity before marriage but not women.
And why is virginity so overrated in the first place? How does it define anything about an individual's character.

This happens only in Mumbai

2009-11-05T19:14:00.000+05:30

When We Graduate....

2009-11-05T12:43:00.001+05:30

My best friend and I live in different cities. All our plans centre around the holidays. That is the only time we have some hope of seeing each other.

Sad truth of the matter is that we may not see each other for another year and a half. That is why all out current plans center around the summer we graduate.

Materialistic bitches that we both are, it's always about the malls in the cities we want to visit than the city itself. After a year of thinking over every fancy holiday resorts and shopping destination, and pestering our parents to let us go alone, our plans decided to take the alternate route.

We decided may be we don't want to go to a fancy place and splurge or sit in a spa, while indulging in some 'rejuvenation'. May be what we really need is a spiritual journey.

About a year back, a friend of mine packed her bags and left for Hrishikesh. She lived in a beautiful ashram among highly evolved spiritual gurus and ordinary people like her, who wished to reach the pinnacle of spirituality someday. And every evening she'd walk up the Himalayas to a solitary cottage that stood among the trees of the dense forest. In that cottage lived a guru who had taken to living alone in the forest, in order to make spirituality the sole focus of her life. Everyday they'd meditate together, while the guru would relay parts of my friends life before her. Through the various exercises she'd find herself healing and letting go off the emotional baggage she has been carrying around with herself for a long time. When she came back she felt like a new person.

I have never been overtly religious. My grandparents go to places like Hrishikesh every now and then. But I never accompany them because I assume the only thing they do is bathe in the holy waters, sing bhajans and pray all the day. But ever since I heard about my friend's experience, I can't wait to go there myself. It sounds something out a Paulo Coelho novel, doesn't it?

So Summer after graduation, Hrishikesh it is! But it doesn't end here. We want to go crazy and explore every spiritual destination in the country. The Himalayas, Kerala, Whitefield, The Osho Ashram, Art of Living, you name it. No proper plans, no time contraints, no count on the money we spend. God knows if we'll ever be that carefree, so I want to make the most of it.

I know most people of my age would want to go to Goa instead, get drunk in some bar while having shirtless phirangs hit on them. Technically speaking, that's what you'd expect 20-years-olds to do. But I guess I am just a little weird that way, and I'm so glad I am so glad I know someone else who possesses the same weirdness that I do. :)

Thirst for knowledge never dies.

2009-11-02T20:11:00.001+05:30

You know, everybody keeps grumbling about how having to study is such a pain in the backside, how they dread exams or how they'd much rather watch twenty episodes of "Kahani Ghar Ghar Kii" back to back than look at their text books.

If I was stuck in say a Medical college or a Banking and Insurance course, I think I'd pretty much be grumbling about the same thing. I'll never forget the days in school when I had to drag myself through pointless subject like Physics and Chemistry or the days in Junior College when I had to study Accounts. It's not that I didn't have the aptitude for it. I just lacked the interest.

Had I taken Arts, I would have loved every bit of it. And I doubt I'd have anything to grumble about. In the the same way if everybody studied something they really liked, half the problem would be solved. As of now, I am quite content lapping up all the knowledge I am getting an opportunity to, but there are many things i still want to learn.

The truth is, we eternally seek knowledge. Why else would we read books, watch movies or go through the newspaper everyday? Intellectual stimulation provides a divine satisfaction. I know it does to me. And I know that I want to bathe in that divine sort of feeling for as long as I live. Bottomline, I never want to stop learning.

It's not about you. It's about me.

2009-10-31T10:12:00.000+05:30

One of the biggest disadvantages of being a Libran is that we're people pleasers.

It is ALWAYS about somebody else.

About going out of the way to make other people happy.

Giving up something that means a lot to you, so you can let someone else have their way.

Not rubbing your beliefs in someone else's face because it might hurt their sentiments.

Always saying the right thing and not because you are afraid of people, but because you are afraid of hurting them.

And worst of all, never ever being able to say no.

A week ago, I got an amazing oppurtunity to be a part of an Art Camp.

I've started taking courses in Colour Therapy and my Teacher seemed seemed pretty pleased with me.

She wanted to sign me up as a Student Volunteer for this camp.

Each volunteer would be assigned to assist an established artist for those two days and basically contribute to the painting.

Considering the fact that I am trying very hard to get in touch with my arty side, nothing could have been better.

But I had already made a commitment to someone else and she wouldn't let me back out.

So what do I do?

I give up the Art Camp.

How do I feel now?

Great.

I learned that people are largely selfish and always do what benefits them.

It doesn't matter to them that you sacrifice more than anyone else would to keep them happy.

So I decided from now on, I'm going to put my foot down and get my way.

From now it's not about you, you or you.

It about me.

Do you really want to live forever?

2009-10-30T21:42:00.001+05:30

I saw Chayji lie like a baby in the hospital bed that day. She looked so shriveled up. So tiny. So weak. And so helpless.

Though her frame is petite, she has always had a decent amount of weight on her and a healthy glow on her cheeks. But that day she looked like a bag of bones. Her cheeks were so hollow, that I felt I'd cry if I looked at them one more time.

The only thing I could see around her was pipes and pipes. Pipes that helped her drink water, pipes that fed her, pipes that helped her urinate. It was as if her whole life depended on them.

Chayji was my grandfathers rakhi sister. She wasn't related to us by blood, but we always thought of her as an important part of our extended family.

That day she looked us helplessly, trying so hard to place our faces. She couldn't recognise any of us. She couldn't even recognise her own children.

Not that they're worth remembering anyway. She gave up her life making sure their lives were perfect. All they did was make her shuttle between different homes every now and then. None of them were willing to take up her responsibility permanently.

Even in the hospital they took turns to look after her. They knew nothing about unconditional love. Or may be they just didn't love her enough to by her side all the time.

Seeing her like this really made me like she was no different from a baby. Just as helpless. Just as dependent. She had no memories. She couldn't walk and she could barely talk.

You know, when it comes to death, we always hope we can outlive it. We're always hoping for a long life for ourselves and for people we care.But seeing lie like this made me think. Do you really want to live forever?

Anita's tears

2009-10-27T22:23:00.001+05:30

Anita isn't someone who'd easily cry. Infact she's so strong, I draw courage from her most of the time. But that day when she cried on my shoulders, I felt my dreams crumble down with hers. I have always thought of marriage as the ultimate symbol of love. Being in a relationship is easy. You know you can walk out of it anytime. Entering into a marriage needs a lot of commitment. If a man is willing to give that to you, he really loves you.

Unfortunately, Anita belongs to the era of arranged marriages. The era in which a woman's wedding topped the priority list and was planned from the day she was born, while education, though imparted didn't even make it to that list.

Of course, right after a good proposal came in, her father without giving it a second thought gave her away in marriage. Did he ask her if she likes him? If he was the kind of boy she had always dreamed of or if she even wanted to get married then? In that era girls were never asked.

So Anita went away to her new house. On the outside it was all perfect right. Big House. A husband who looks decent and earns pretty well. Promise of a honeymoon to a foreign land. And of course many more luxuries to come. Well even the man she married was pretty nice. May be he spoke a little too much and seemed a little immature at times. But as they say 'he had a good heart'.

But is all of that enough for a happy marriage? Can the luxuries keep you satisfied? Can you truly be happy with a person you can barely connect with, no matter how nice he is?

Marriage calls for a lot of sacrifice. When two people completely different in more ways than one, take an oath to be a part of each other's lives until death does them apart, there are lot of adjustments to be done. There is need of understanding and need of adapting. Anita, of course belonged to the era in which women had no option but to comply. I can't say the same about her husband though. He didn't make an attempt to understand her or her family, or the small things that made a big difference to her.

But I guess it is always the small things that ruin relationships. I don't know what it is that he said or did, but when she cried that day, I knew that he had blown the last straw. She cried like one who had lost all hope in life. And the emptiness in her eyes, broke my heart.

As far as tears go, I classify them as 'tears of sadness' and 'tears of hopelessness'. Sometimes I cry to release the pent up emotions. 'Tears of sadness' as I said. And then there are times that my tears tear me apart. I feel like I'm so down, nothing could get me up. Life suddenly seems so glum that, even the brightest of things fail to bring joy. And those are the tears I classify as 'tears of hopelessness'.

That was precisely how Anita cried. If Anita lived my life, a few minutes after the heart-wrenching sobs would have taken over her body, her phone would ring, a friend would fill her in with gossip and so many random details of the day that for a while she'd be totally distracted. And then she'd be suddenly reminded of a party she has to attend or an assignment she has to complete and her focus would be shifted almost completely. Even if the one thing that bothered her the most wasn't the solved, the many distractions would have made sure the problem was far away from her.

But Anita was forty something. She didn't have a job. She didn't even have a degree. She was six months away from becoming a lawyer when she became a wife. And Anita belonged to the era in which women didn't complete their degrees once they were married. She had two children. Both of them were too involved in their lives to care about her. She had no dreams that were soon to be materialised, no degrees to be completed, no parties to attend, no assignments to finish. All she had was her husband and a marriage that was based on incompatibility that grew every day.

She belonged to the era in which women didn't leave their husbands, unless the man was a wife beater or a womaniser. Women didn't attend social social events without their husbands. To think that she'd have the courage to strike out on her own was an impossible thought. To think that may be she'd try to seek true love was pushing it too far.

Everytime the sound of her sobs, rings in my head, I think about all the things she deserves, but never got, All the love that was meant to be hers, but never found her and probably never will and how she will be reminded of that each and everyday for as long as she lives.

As for me, I wish each and everyday I could do something for her, but the truth is, I am just a nineteen year old girl, who harbours the hope that someday with that perfect marriage, I'll watch my life magically transform. And once again the sound of the sobs rise from my subconcious and I wonder if I'm naive or simply delusional.

Diwali Greetings to All :)

2009-10-18T11:57:00.000+05:30

While I'm not really a big fan of the 'Festival of Lights' and all the damage it causes to the environment, it's that auspicious time of the year and I'm just going to focus on the positives and leave the negatives for another time of the year :)

Here's a list of things I love about Diwali

Love how I get invited to fancy lunches and dinners everyday
Love how the house is so full of sweets, there is no place to walk
Love how I get to wear unreasonable amounts of bling
Love how the streets are all beautiful and lit up
But what i love the most is how it makes me :)

Art and what it means to me

2009-10-12T21:21:00.000+05:30

I was sitting in Candies before my exams pretending to study when this couple comes and sits in the table next to us. Delighted at the sudden distraction, i started eavesdropping on their conversation. I'm such a compulsive eavesdropper you know. I love listening to things I'm not supposed to listen to and switch off when I'm actually supposed to listen and absorb. The thrills of the 'Forbidden fruit' I tell you.
Coming back to the point. I was going to tell you what they were talking about and how it affected me. Well the word painting and art seemed to be omnipresent in their conversation. "I sold my painting for 20,000." "His parents wanted so badly to buy my new painting". "Sometimes I feel like I'm possessed. I sit all day working on my painting. And then there are times I can't look at my canvas for days."
It wasn't very hard to relate to what they were talking about. Even as a writer you feel pretty much the same way. But that wasn't why the conversation had an impact on me. It filled me with a sense of nostalgia for the world of colours, paintbrushes, messy hands and beautiful pictures. It took me back to the days when Art actually had some meaning in my life.
From the days in pre-school when I got a chalk-board to draw a picture accompanying the word I was learning, or the days in 7th grade when I tried so hard to make sure my paintings made it to the School board, or the day before my intermediate exam when I refused to sleep because I wanted to practice everything I could get my hands on. My notebooks are a living testimony to all my artwork. They contained less study material and more sketches. Infact the text books didn't escape the attack of the sketches either.
So here I am, years after I said goodbye to an important part of me, making a resolution that no matter what happens I am going to get that old box of poster paints out and sign up for canvas painting lessons before the end of next year! :)

Happy birthday!

2009-10-12T20:28:00.000+05:30

No I'm not starting this blog with a post about how someone else should have an awesome birthday and how much they mean to me.
I'm not that kind really.
I am however going to wish myself, because it was my birthday yesterday...
So well happy birthday to me :)

And again I'm not going to make a list of all the things I can do to save the world, conserve water or save the girl child. Which of course at some point of time in my life I want to, but now I'm just going to be a little selfish and list all the things I want.

Rajat Kapoor. Judge me and die.
DevD. This really cute professor I had this semester. He had overgrown hair, which he'd ruffle every now and then while explaining something. And he'd come up with the most random theories about space and time. He 'd tell us how he blames Body Shop for the increasing number of terrorists! And other such absurd things. But he's a cutie and he'd make the perfect birthday present.
Farhaaaan. *heart goes flip-flop*
Pink skyscraper heels. Because every list is incomplete without pink. =)
Black Stilettos with diamonds. Not the real ones. I am not that greedy. YET. :)
Gladiatorssss. Well semi gladiators actually. Tan coloured and all. Yea I know I should shut up about shoes already.
Pink Curtains for my bed. (I have a princess bed) =D
A contemporary looking lampshade for the room.
Lots and lots of wall painting to put up on the newly painted wall.
May be a nice wall hanging as well.
Loads of nice scented candles.
Oh and a nice body mist from Body Shop.
A new Diary!
365 days of endless fun.

So my list is pretty short isn't it? Wow, I must be improving. Happy 19 to me again. =D